tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-337521642024-03-13T18:28:43.052-02:00Motherhood DeletedMy home, my blog, my opinions. I will not post any pro-adoption comments. This is not a forum for debate.Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.comBlogger600125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-79335361007501955312012-07-25T12:20:00.000-02:002012-07-25T12:20:04.938-02:00Letter To Santa<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<em>Dear Santa,</em></div>
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<em>I hope you don't mind me calling you by your first name. I have long known that you are not real, but, since I am entering my second childhood, I am going to suspend disbelief for a bit.</em></div>
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<em>I have a long list for you and I urge you to hurry because much of this needs to be done BEFORE the holidays. </em></div>
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<em>First off, I would like to see all the adoption records and Original Birth Certificates opened for both Mothers and Adoptees, without exception. I think that we have been maligned enough and our children have been denied enough to suit the Puritanical idea that we should have been punished for being human. Infant adoption should be a very last resort kind of thing and could we try that legal guardianship thing?</em><em> I would like to see the concepts of social engineering and the importance of money removed from that equation, and special efforts made to keep Mothers and their infants together. We both know, don't we Santa, that is the way things SHOULD be?</em></div>
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<em>Now for some toughies. Can you do something to deep-six Citizens United, Corporate Personhood, ALEC and the Dominionists? They are sending the world to hell in a hand basket in the name of the almighty dollar and ignorance disguised as ideology. Could you make the media trustworthy again and restore journalistic ethics? I know it's a tall order, but I have been a very good girl. If you could scuttle DOMA, too, that would be wonderful.</em></div>
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<em>As I am sure you know,(for I am sure word reaches the busy environs of your North Pole Headquarters) we are in an election year. A little special consideration to the current POTUS would be much appreciated and really good for our country. Oh, and there is a big list I will be sending you of some people for your naughty list, Tea Party Members, John Birchers, KKK members and a bunch of Republican Governors. If you could see fit to engineer their disbanding and defeat, it would be a Merry Xmas, indeed!</em></div>
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<em>How are you on reversing global warming and protecting the environment? Our businesses and governments have not done a real good job at this. In fact, the North Pole might be snowless and iceless if fossil fuel craziness and emissions and pollution aren't halted. They are cutting down the trees faster than we can grow them. I have four great-grandchildren who might never again see a glacier or a wild animal or a forest if greed doesn't turn to green.</em></div>
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<em>How busy are your elves and can you spare some of the heftier ones? I think the breach in the wall between church and state needs to be repaired and made stronger. For those of us who are not religious, the protection of that wall is essential. Those dedicated fundamentalists can be vicious! One even wrote a letter to the editor of her local paper, demanding that all atheists be run out of the country....and the editor printed it! That was a real "face-palm" moment for me.</em></div>
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<em>It goes without saying that I would love to see an end to war, racism, sexism, and all the stuff that people do to make themselves feel like the big cheese and make others seem unworthy and expendable. If we can stop hating and stop fighting, then we won't have as much poverty and crime. I mean, as a species, aren't we supposed to grow up at some point?</em></div>
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<em>Now, I don't wish anyone ill or, Dear Me No, dead, but there is a state called Utah.........I guess not, huh?</em></div>
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<em>I'll have wine, cheese and goodies waiting for you, Santa. If they are not to your taste, I'll just have to eat them myself. It's fun being a kid again.</em></div>
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<em>Love and Thank You,</em></div>
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<em>Your Friend, Robin</em></div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-74098825181624830482012-07-08T13:28:00.000-02:002012-07-08T13:29:03.596-02:00Beheading The Hydra<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span lang="EN-US">"<em>The Hydra is first mentioned in the Greek
myth of Hercules, in the golden age of the culture (500 to 300 BC) when the
hero, as one of many jobs, had to kill the Lernaean Hydra The most famous of the
Hydra species.</em></span></div>
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<span lang="EN-US"><em>The descriptions vary, but they always
mention an aquatic serpent like creature that lives in a subterranean cave in
Lernea Lake in Greece. It is described to have many heads (the number can vary
from 3 or 5 to 10 to 100 to 1.000 and even to 10.000); the reason for this is
that when you decapitate one head of a Hydra, two will grow in its place."</em></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">I have long thought of the myth of the Hydra as being representative of the complexities of the problems we often experience in life. Sometimes, it's not as simple as cutting off the head and waiting for the problem to die. Sometimes, we have to stand back and look at the big picture, see the monster for what it is (a big scary sumbitch) and gird our loins accordingly.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">In the US, today, we are up to our collective asses in Hydras. We are surrounded by greed, poverty, ignorance, intolerance, injustice, malice and superstition. It often seems that if we gain a little victory over one issue, another two pop up in its place. We are frustrated, frightened and, too often, looking for someone to blame rather than trying to find progressive and effective solutions.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">The US has created its own Hydra. It has scales of greenbacks, teeth of want, the anger of ignorance, and the poison of lies spews from its mulitple mouths. The head to be feared the most is that of ignorance. The blind acceptance of the words of the wealthy and powerful, the need to have others do our thinking for us and the assault on the human necessity of a good education has weakened us. People actually support those who would enact laws that are in direct violation of the these same voters' best interests.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">I remember talking, years ago, to a woman who was sweet but not well educated. She was insisting that something was true that was not because she said she read it in the newspaper. I asked her what paper and she, triumphantly, showed me her copy of the National Enquirer. Ohhkaayyyy. This copy was stating that LBJ was behind labs that were experimenting on intergalactic aliens. I have finally realized that a biased and controlled media is also one of the heads of the Hydra. There are those who will believe that there IS a Bat Boy that was found, living in a cave and that Elvis was a secret agent and is living in Russia after faking his death. There are those that will believe the POTUS is a Kenyan Muslim and will never be shaken from that erroneous belief.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">With gullibility of this nature, why not have a program on a so-called "educational" network about ancient aliens whose existence is postulated by pseudo-scientists with bad hair? Why not have Jerry Springer and Maury and Storage Wars and all the dumb stuff for dumb people that is aired on TV? Why not have religion trying to take over the law of the land? Hell, we rank and file Amurricans will believe anything.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">I finally have arrived at the conclusion that we need to stab the Hydra in its heart. Our system needs renewing, renovating and a big cleaning job needs to be done in our Congress and various state legislations. We need to put new bricks in that wall between Church and State and reinforce it with rebar and concrete. Without this kind of action, the small minds and greedy hearts that are running the various shows will just multiply. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Arial;">We can only do what we can do. We can speak out, stand up for the principals of equality and dignity and higher learning. We can vote, we can write, we can blog and we can, at least TRY to kill this monster that is taking us down. I have no idea of how successful we can be, but I do know that if we do nothing, then we deserve what we get. And that is the truth.</span>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-12787093203101945912012-07-05T19:44:00.000-02:002012-07-05T19:44:57.936-02:00A Nice, Little Town<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Georgia, serif;"><span style="font-size: 100%;">I live in Sanford, FL. It is a </span>homogeneous community. We run the gamut from white to black and all colors in between. There is a lovely little downtown made up of mostly antique and art stores with some nice eateries. Sanford sits on the banks of the St. Johns River where it widens into Lake Monroe. For the most part, people tend to get along. But there are those who still carry the hate of racism bred by fear of anything or anyone different in their hearts.<span style="font-size: 100%;"> </span></span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">Recently, a young black man was shot and killed by a self-appointed vigilante. The 911 calls and the circumstances definitely lead to the conclusion that this death, which devastated a family, did NOT have to happen. Little Sanford was in the news for all the wrong reasons and so many of us who live here found ourselves angry that this happened and distressed for those touched by this terrible tragedy. Until this happened, very few people knew where Sanford is, who Trayvon Martin was and who George Zimmerman is.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">I've not posted in a long time. I have found myself so overwhelmed by the injustices across the board in our nation, today, that it has been difficult for me to sort it all out. The shooting of Trayvon Martin has been one part of the insanity that seems to permeate our lives on every front. Political and social unrest are the norm and many of us are learning that things are not the way they taught us, in Government studies and American History, in school. I thought I had gone past my naivete', but I still had and still have a lot of eye-opening to do.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">The inequities between the 1% and the 99% have never been more obvious. The fact is that there ARE people in this society whom those in power, the people able to make decisions and do things, believe are more entitled that others. That has long been obvious in the adoption industry. But now, there is no longer even a feeble attempt to conceal that sense of entitlement. If you are part of a certain race, a certain religion and a certain income level, then you are immediately considered among the elite. That sucks. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">I wonder if we are seeing a backlash for daring to elect a Chief Executive who happens to be a man of color? Gee...Ya think? I remember being elated when the POTUS was elected. I thought that this was it...we, as a society, were finally maturing past the ignorance of the past. Boy, was I ever under a misapprehension. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">The past year of campaigning has been an orgy of hate, lies and insanity and now there are people who remain uninformed or consider themselves above the fray who could contribute to the taking down of the real America. The acceptance of single motherhood may well be one of the casualties if this horrible thing were to come to pass.</span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">So no, I have not abandoned the plight of Exiled Mothers and adopted people. I am dealing with the fact that my daughter and I are oil and water, right now. It is a conundrum that takes the breath out of me from time to time. I still stand for the right for Mothers AND their Adult Children to have access to OBC's and adoption records. I still stand fast against infant adoption that is, so often, terribly unnecessary. I still support Planned Parenthood, access to birth control and The Right To Choose. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">But I have seen that all of the previous paragraph is one page of the Book of The Decline Of America. We have a lot of work to do on many fronts. No one of us can do everything. Not all of our priorities are the same. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">Right now, my attention is on the simple fact that for us to survive as a nation, we need to learn how to accept each other. We need to care about what happens to those who are hurt, needy and crying out for help. We need to be a community. </span><br />
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<span style="font-family: Georgia;">We need to be, on the inside, what Sanford seems to be on the outside. </span><br />Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-24082758423830443882012-03-13T14:59:00.005-02:002012-03-13T15:18:51.100-02:00Somebody Needs a Time Out<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgi6llbeiyzvvRFE5zSRoqB_85oaUTVJ6rwGrQiiAaBt7MOk6BzzPrB0LQK4gVoczZcFawjB1ErU5C3AWR-5A5is4Hl7b1Xe_Tzc0tp2iQsJtcK5pu1dNiERbykPuNLhMaomRL3kg/s1600/trolls.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px 10px 10px 0px; width: 320px; height: 211px; float: left; cursor: pointer;" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5719431012113394098" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgi6llbeiyzvvRFE5zSRoqB_85oaUTVJ6rwGrQiiAaBt7MOk6BzzPrB0LQK4gVoczZcFawjB1ErU5C3AWR-5A5is4Hl7b1Xe_Tzc0tp2iQsJtcK5pu1dNiERbykPuNLhMaomRL3kg/s320/trolls.jpg" /></a><br /><div>They say, "Don't feed the Trolls" and I, to a certain extent, agree. But I am sitting here, wondering what nerve I touched or if this is just general verbal garbage.</div><div><br /></div><div> </div><div>Our old friend "Anonymous"(Indian name is "Big Coward Afraid To Use Real Name") who seems to have problems with either sentence structure or English, left this gem in response to my "Shameful" post. When I get the really ridiculous, ignorant, totally off-the-wall comments, I love to shine the light of day on them. </div><div><br /></div><div> </div><div><em><strong>"Anonymous has left a new comment on your post "</strong></em><a title="http://motherhooddeleted.blogspot.com/2012/03/shameful.html" href="http://motherhooddeleted.blogspot.com/2012/03/shameful.html"><em><strong>Shameful</strong></em></a><em><strong>":<br />Won't you die already, old daughter of a bitch cunt. We do not care your<br />mother did not provide you with sufficient affection and love. Thankfully your<br />bigotry and views will be a thing of the past once your generation will<br />disappear."</strong></em> </div><div><em><strong><br /></strong></em></div><div> </div><div>So tell me, Anonymous; Was all the red licked off your candy, recently, or did someone urinate in your granola? It had to hit hard for you to call my mother names. Seeing as how she is deceased and beyond your gibes, the worst things you called me were "old" and "bigot." LOL...He/She don't know me vewwy well, do he/she?</div><div><br /></div><div> </div><div>Well, Trolls are gonna troll and they love to get a rise out of anyone. Have a good day, Anon. My friends and I have had a big laugh at your nastiness which is both clumsy and shows a gigantic lack of emotional control. Hope you got some bang for your buck. <span style="font-size: 100%; ">Happy trolling!</span></div><div><br /></div><div> </div><div> (Is it just me or is the world getting nastier?)</div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-17972606175209273762012-03-06T10:47:00.009-02:002012-03-09T13:54:52.106-02:00That Was Then...Look At Now<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitkG0qqs9HnUKvxvqXHSxHYXb59L6j6kJwxwGXkOkOASVLjFXaBa3xF-CGGGaMqIxd2fo5IeVCSH0_5ZnrQashPMsHbRtUdTJoRW1NT8Vy34RxTys1wXrpCSElZOO6X0GHh5cX-Q/s1600/rushbabies.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px 10px 10px 0px; width: 218px; height: 320px; float: left; cursor: pointer;" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5716765151850287314" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitkG0qqs9HnUKvxvqXHSxHYXb59L6j6kJwxwGXkOkOASVLjFXaBa3xF-CGGGaMqIxd2fo5IeVCSH0_5ZnrQashPMsHbRtUdTJoRW1NT8Vy34RxTys1wXrpCSElZOO6X0GHh5cX-Q/s320/rushbabies.jpg" /></a><br />In 1962, ANY young woman who had even just one sex partner outside the bonds of holy deadlock was called a Slut, with impunity. And we had no recourse except to hold our heads up and try to survive. Some went into the closet and never came out again. Round heels, whores, "mattress-backs," tarts, hussies, easy and pushovers...those were just a few of the ways people referred to even the young woman who loved not wisely but too well. We were even held to blame if we were raped.<div><br /></div><div>Once the Slut Bomb was thrown at you, it was hard to shed the title. In a small town wher<span style="font-size:100%;">e everyone knew everyone, it was nearly impossible. Girls were having sex that were either lucky or infertile. One woman I know who bragged of her virginity on her wedding day admitted to servicing her fiance manually until the big night.</span></div><div><span><u><br /></u></span><div><br /></div><div>The thing I find so absurd is that, had we had access to safe, </div><div>effective birth control in those days, we would have passed the marital finish line with reputation intact. Our fecundity was the curse that landed us in Slut-land. Back then, we just put up with the indignities that the cruel and Puritanical laid on us and tried to get on with living, as hard as that was. I was one that was determined to regain respectability by hook or crook. I don't think, in the eyes of my small community, that I ever did it. Once labeled, always labeled.</div><div><br /></div><div>Now a young woman, a student, comes before Congress to plead the case for birth control for all and she gets slammed in the worst way with no evidence but that she advocates for the rights of all women to have access. The pompous and misanthropic Rush Limbaugh made crude observations and even cruder suggestions. And American women are up in arms and ready to do battle. </div><div><br /></div><div>THIS is the kind of progress that has happened since I was a "teen-aged, unwed mother" in the early '60's. I, silly me, thought that the days of judging women by such stringent and unreasonable guidelines was over. But there is that small, LOUD, sex-obsessed group of theocrats, pundits and right-wing extremists who want to drag us all, kicking and screaming, back into the 19th century.</div></div><div><div><br /></div><div>We, the products of our generation, had no real arena in which to protest the outrageous sexism of our day. Women struggled for one and got it and now they are geared up to use it. Women from all over the country and good, open-minded men, have written and called the sponsors of Limbaugh's show, carried on Clear Channel outlets, and he has apologized, weakly, twice. He is losing ad revenue for his sponsors and I see him fading away, just as Glenn Beck is doing. One woman answered his challenge in the New York Times.</div><div><br /></div><div><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEitkG0qqs9HnUKvxvqXHSxHYXb59L6j6kJwxwGXkOkOASVLjFXaBa3xF-CGGGaMqIxd2fo5IeVCSH0_5ZnrQashPMsHbRtUdTJoRW1NT8Vy34RxTys1wXrpCSElZOO6X0GHh5cX-Q/s1600/rushbabies.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px 10px 10px 0px; width: 320px; height: 239px; float: left; cursor: pointer;" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5716773728698635938" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhTzBCily-INoqdwQBgyBQQz-SyMPrIH2Yl78V48waCDXowydhnUjn_6TsrSLpyd7gGdmUEXdSiesQpmwTwBCPzbK0Itq0RTi2DhMs5ZT3SlGgFDWlJlEJDctZGpyohVfwUxfDHmg/s320/rushad.jpg" /></a></div></div><div>I, for one, can't let this idiocy go unchallenged. The pudgy pundit is just one example of the unfair war against women..an attempt to "keep us in our place" by the powerfully insecure. We have GOP-heavy state legislatures churning out the anti-choice legislation as fast as they can but not doing a damn thing about the economy or jobs. We have a Klown Kollege Kampaign with Mittens McMoney, Ron "Stormfront" Paul, Newt "Philanderer" Gingrinch and the worst of the crazies, Sick Rantorum or "Frothy" (Google him).</div><div><br /></div><div>What is worse is that there are other women who support this retrogression of our gender by force. They are the ones who blow me away. The pursed lips, bibles in hand and the box of tea bags usually gives them away. These prissy, asexual types would make good adoption agency social workers.....or nuns. I am sick of seeing hands slapped and voices stifled just because they are female. Oh, they allow the likes of Caribou Barbie, Coulter, Bat-Crazy Bachmann and others like them to have a say, but they speak as puppets of the Patriarchy or because they are simply nuts. As this gem from Patricia Heaton illustrates; "I really have great sympathy for Ms. Fluke and so in order to help her out I want to urge everyone to place at least one (unused) condom in an envelope and send to her at:Sandra Fluke C/OGeorgetown University Law Center600NewJersey Ave., NW,Washington,DC20001Maybe if enough of us respond she can make it through at least the next few months." For this atrocity in the LATimes, she offered a Limbaugh-Weak apology.</div><div><br /></div><div>The GOP would not allow Sandra Fluke to testify in front of their panel yet entertained a full contingent of male clerics as "experts" on women's health. Sex-obsessed and using the fallacious sins of Eve to charge forth, these misogynists are forgetting one thing. Women are not like they were in the bad old days. We have a voice.</div><div><br /></div><div>This upcoming election is important to the mothers of the BSE in more ways than one. We can erase that scarlet letter, once and for all, for us and our female progeny, by voting these dickless wonders out of office and refusing to remain silent. We have talked about our outrage at how we were treated in the past. How can we stand by and allow it to happen again? </div><div><br /></div><div>We can speak up, now. They can throw names all they like, but we don't have to pick them up and wear them. They took our self-esteem, our autonomy and our babies and left us with ashes and they got away with it.</div><div><br /></div><div>But that was then and this is now.</div><div></div></div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-87072497265460313202012-03-05T10:28:00.005-02:002012-03-05T11:24:02.662-02:00Shameful<div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiP50ebbEQRVqeJyzPe6F45_R2eR93UWx_uPCErpRbUiWyEDcdysFJ8NBodLbrD9MjjJ1rYFoPTMbzGav-AZAH32_NBEvuuChJsa_CBcNwb0easiLBHYpbmgRribUmgA0E7KV6OCA/s1600/shame.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px 10px 10px 0px; width: 320px; height: 256px; float: left; cursor: pointer;" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5716396443928557394" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiP50ebbEQRVqeJyzPe6F45_R2eR93UWx_uPCErpRbUiWyEDcdysFJ8NBodLbrD9MjjJ1rYFoPTMbzGav-AZAH32_NBEvuuChJsa_CBcNwb0easiLBHYpbmgRribUmgA0E7KV6OCA/s320/shame.jpg" /></a><br /><div>My friend, Sandy, aka, Musing Mother, wrote a deeply moving and profound post, yesterday, entitled <a href="http://musing-mother.blogspot.com/2012/03/wheres-outrage.html">"Where's the Outrage?"</a> Good question, Sandy. Damn good question.</div><div><br /></div><div> </div><div> </div><div>I have such a deep, emotional investment in the need for justice for the mothers and adult children who were separated during the BSE, given no choice, no help, no right to even grieve our losses. This need has been an open wound and the actions of the Australian enquiry that is generating an apology (which is a good START) to the mothers of their BSE was like pouring alcohol into that wound. </div><div><br /></div><div> </div><div> </div><div>I am so happy for the Mothers of the Australian BSE. I stand in awe of their determination and drive. I think of Di Welfare and her battle and hope, somehow, she knows that Lily Arthur and others carried on and are making inroads and that her struggle was worth it. Kudos, Ladies.</div><div> </div><div> </div><div>The pain comes from knowing that we, who are supposed to be the "modern" nation, are lagging behind, woefully, in progress. </div><div><br /></div><div>Our victories have been small and the job ahead is momentous and in need of fewer factions and more cooperation. Like Sandy, I weep for the American mothers and adoptees. I weep because I see little to encourage me. I weep out of sheer envy that the Aussie Moms have a few reasonable people who listen in their government. I weep because we have become an elitist nation with no true democracy that would allow us to be taken seriously by the powerful.</div><div><br /></div><div> </div><div> </div><div>I have become, as I grow older, increasingly ashamed of our government, our obsession with the bottom line and the Puritanical atmosphere that pervades the halls of our legislatures, courts and campaigns. We are NOT the leaders of the free world. We are dragging and lagging in so much and it is the attitudes that say business is more important than people and that we need to control with religion which has held us back.</div><div><br /></div><div> </div><div> </div><div>I am reminded of an old TV commercial for a cigarette that had a jingle.."You've come a long way, Baby," as if having a 'feminine' smoke was a hallmark of our struggle as women. They played that commercial to death, yet the ERA failed by just a few states. Fear-mongering by the few and the loud brought it down. To me, that is just one of the indications of the sheer size of the struggle facing the Mothers and adoptees who want justice, open records and redress rather than the condescending kind of profit-based, token replies we have seen so far. </div><div><br /></div><div> </div><div> </div><div>Cooperation, mutual support and understanding and respect between the different factions of this struggle in the USA could go a long way towards progress. I echo Sandy and other mothers who have carried seething outrage under our skins for decades. It's time to voice that outrage, to stop cutting off our noses to spite our faces, and stand together. If we don't, I know I will go to my grave, not ashamed of who I am, but ashamed of the nation of my birth. </div><div><br /></div><div> </div><div> </div><div>The mothers in Australia have made this fight as much about them as it is about the adoptees. They have no problem with making their needs as important as those of their children. It's past time for us to do the same. We also have issues, pain and righteous anger over the way we were treated. We are Mothers who were not given the right to raise our own children over some kind of silly, religion-based, social mandate and we are pissed.</div><div><br /></div><div> </div><div> </div><div>And there is no shame in that.</div></div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-15485782630824666822012-02-21T20:40:00.005-02:002012-02-21T21:36:11.666-02:00Strangest Bedfellows<div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2TspwpP3uNrS2QNo57U3m1Ai4-0WY3mEM9ywFmHY0ZpQjiijLvpmkOWAIBkJr3c8yvu5xd5s2X3L3kLqlevYYMrsIZbNzdpSTRYje_CUnwetzV0SG7VvMuwGkoUSE71CYFDzwNQ/s1600/strange-bedfellows-pic-1-678-photo-440243-s-original.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px 10px 10px 0px; width: 320px; height: 195px; float: left; cursor: pointer;" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5711730234077556850" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2TspwpP3uNrS2QNo57U3m1Ai4-0WY3mEM9ywFmHY0ZpQjiijLvpmkOWAIBkJr3c8yvu5xd5s2X3L3kLqlevYYMrsIZbNzdpSTRYje_CUnwetzV0SG7VvMuwGkoUSE71CYFDzwNQ/s320/strange-bedfellows-pic-1-678-photo-440243-s-original.jpg" /></a><br />I have been more political than adoption-oriented of late. And I went through a long, dry spell when I just couldn't, with all the other crap going on in the world, work up even a little bit of the old passion and fire. But Rick Santorum....yes, that's right...Rick Santorum, Old Frothy himself has geared me up for another go.<div><br /></div><div>I will never understand mothers of loss who adopt. And you can bet your paycheck that, once they do, the adopter trumps the mother, everytime. I have a harder time with women who went through the injustice and indignities of the BSE who vote for the anti-choice candidates and are content with extremist, right-wing MEN making decisions about birth control.</div><div><br /></div><div>HAVE WE LEARNED NOTHING?? If we ever, ever get a shot at justice, it is not going to be on the specious prayers of the rigid, Dominionist right. As far as they are concerned, we are still in the 19th century and we are still sluts. There is a cartoon showing what the inauguration of Frothy would be like and it showed all the women in burkhas. That is NOT far from the reality that this man espouses.</div><div><br /></div><div>While Santorum pushed me over the edge, I have been getting nearer and nearer to that precipice as I watch the GOP members of Congress at work. Are they debating job programs. Have they introduced any legislative solutions to the economic crisis? Hell no! They are too concerned with what goes on in our bedrooms and reproductive organs to do something actually productive. They are trying a strategy of flogging us with ideology while dazzling us with sanctimonious bullshit.</div><div><br /></div><div>With a group of asshats like that in power, justice and adoption reform of any kind are just a distant dream. Yeah, I know the pro-adoption bunch sit on both sides of the aisle but tell me the truth. Can't we have a better chance with elected officials that try to respect the rights of women in general or am I going daft in my dotage?</div><div><br /></div><div>Those of us in my age group, the mothers of the BSE, know what it was like to have no autonomy, little say in our own fate or the fate of our infants and living our experience as the daughters of Eve...responsible for the lusty behavior of the male 50% of our dilemma. We remember when we were held responsible if we were raped. It was all on our shoulders. </div><div><br /></div><div>So we were good girls and tried to be the best mothers we could be and were constantly told that the best mother we could be would be an "un-mother" and that our children would really be grateful. Guess what. Most of them didn't like it worth a damn!</div><div><br /></div><div>I had thought that we had come a long way from that oppressive time. But if we don't use our memories and if we fall for the Pharisee that shouts "Lord! Lord!" the loudest, we are going to lose some precious ground. The government will be in our beds, our healthcare and our reproductive decisions and we will be back in the same old boat. Screw that! There have been too many broken hearts, too many tears, too many relationships that are forever bent out of recognizable shape by an unnatural separation. There have been too many families torn apart too many times by people who HAVE NO BUSINESS MESSING IN OUR BUSINESS! <a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2lJVVJn4Wfe3uah_bcIqgAPjBQ0JeS4EpqhLvfTK2hizc4F44K3_wT07x7adbL8i1dZWhDY74xosnw4koBNH-ftscOBnQFF2zWmX4ThFZ9mBKSSPMY5rwFMIKgljkQ5aQYGEMJg/s1600/santorumism.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px 10px 10px 0px; width: 320px; height: 211px; float: left; cursor: pointer;" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5711736654169289202" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2lJVVJn4Wfe3uah_bcIqgAPjBQ0JeS4EpqhLvfTK2hizc4F44K3_wT07x7adbL8i1dZWhDY74xosnw4koBNH-ftscOBnQFF2zWmX4ThFZ9mBKSSPMY5rwFMIKgljkQ5aQYGEMJg/s320/santorumism.jpg" /></a></div><div><br /></div><div>These are the same people who cry out for smaller government yet want to micro-manage the lives of women. We have to send a strong message to these good old boys. We have to boot them out of the bedroom and vote them out of our wombs. Our marital status, our decisions about contraception and pregnancy, our sexual orientations are not what government is about. </div><div><br /></div><div>Jobs, healthcare, education, infrastructure....all these are the things to which our national government and our state governments should be attending. Any mothers who are in league with the extremist Far Right are into extremely strange bedfellows or else they are just masochists who can't use the brains they were born with. </div><div><br /></div><div>Excuse me if I refuse to lie down with control freaks who want to tell me what I can and cannot do with my own body. There!</div></div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-8790983445997891422012-02-19T16:38:00.006-02:002012-02-19T21:04:56.813-02:00Time To Go...AHEAD<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0MW4uFDB8Gezfx07G5010dc4WlogA4izHh5pGgd8EHTQrgkI4GYToJP9fB85H394XdnYg9v5oKLmDJ4UyNacoBKWLusTI1WZnkuY5cR3sUCJzbwfL6N8pTKSZVdZ_NWVGwHcl1Q/s1600/newbeginning.jpg"><img style="margin: 0px 10px 10px 0px; width: 275px; height: 183px; float: left; cursor: pointer;" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5710928969895911746" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi0MW4uFDB8Gezfx07G5010dc4WlogA4izHh5pGgd8EHTQrgkI4GYToJP9fB85H394XdnYg9v5oKLmDJ4UyNacoBKWLusTI1WZnkuY5cR3sUCJzbwfL6N8pTKSZVdZ_NWVGwHcl1Q/s320/newbeginning.jpg" /></a><br />It is past time to kick the garbage out. It is past time to see the last of the Becks, Santorums, Gingrinches, Bachmanns, Palins and Limbaughs, the Boehners, Cantors and Mitchells. It is time to see the back end of the Kochs and Norquists and Fat Cat CEO's as they leave the halls of our governments to the people. <div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br /></div><div>It's time to bid a happy farewell to superstition, to the pulpit-pounders, fear-mongers, papal fripperies, priestly foibles, funeral demonstrators and TV evangelical, power-hungry wannabes. It's time to open the door and push out all the flesh-peddlers posing as missionaries and agencies supposedly helping poor mothers, along with the planet-killers and abusers of all species, human and animal.<div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br /></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">It's time to leave hellfire and brimstone behind and live the lives we were meant to live, with reason, and humane morality. It is time to build an extra thickness and height into that wall of separation between state and church. It is time to enact legislation based on reality and reason rather than the patriarchial prattle of stone-age herders.</div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br /></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">It is time for men to leave the decisions about a woman's health and reproduction to the owner of her body...to HER. It is time to get the extreme conservatives and dirty-minded church deacons and pastors out of the wombs of the 52% of our population that claims them by the right of gender. It is time for all of them to get the Hell out of our bedrooms. </div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br /></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">It is time to tell people, everywhere in this country, that you can be as biased as you like, but you better not act on it by denying equal treatment or enacting any of your knee-jerk eugenics on those who are different. It is time to render to our President the respect due his office and his intelligence and efforts.</div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br /></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">It is time to banish poverty, out-of-reach healthcare, homelessness and injustice. It is time to allow people to protect their earnings and their ability to earn a living, to protect jobs and create more. It is time to stop throwing money into the military machine and start repairing our nation's infrastructure. It's time to begin increasing the quality and availability of a good education and lowering the burden for students and parents. It is time for compassion and common sense.</div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br /></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">It is time to stop the rape and ruin of our Constitution and to welcome Lady Liberty and Lady Justice back into their rightful places, torch, blindfold and scales and all. It is time to stop being arrogant nationalists, snobbish isolationists and wavers of the flag and the cross. It is time to realize that our country is far from perfect...Hell, it isn't even close, and work on trying to fix it. It is time to take the money out of government and the bribes out of the lobbies of Congress.</div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br /></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">It is time for each of us, no matter the age, gender, income, color or level of education, to have our say. We are the life's blood of the USA. Without us, there is no one for the power mongers to oppress, cheat or hurt. It is no longer just a matter of OUR rights but more a matter of WHAT'S right. </div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br /></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">The harvest is down the road, but the seeds are being planted. We till our own rows, we talk the talk and walk the walk and then we reap. A long time ago, I learned that what is right is very simple, but never easy. It takes work. It takes courage. It takes wanting better for everyone..not just oneself. I don't have any quick answers except to keep talking, keep writing the people in government, sign and pass on petitions, pass out information and stay informed, yourself. </div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br /></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">Don't depend on major media sound bites and a single newspaper. Dig deep, investigate, research and be willing to accept it if you have erred on the side or your own personal bias. Shoe leather isn't too bad with salt and a beer. Open your mind and learn. </div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br /></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">It is said that a person with problems will only start to get better when they finally hit bottom. Well, I have watched for over 66 years as this beautiful land we live in has gone down a very slippery slope. Our technical achievements have far outstripped our social advances. I have learned the sad lesson that anyone, all the way up to Supreme Court Justices CAN BE BOUGHT!</div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br /></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">Our puritanical attitudes are an international joke and the Ugly American is an international reality. It is a small world now. We have to live with other nations, and other races and we have to do it in a true spirit of cooperation. Again..simple but not easy.</div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br /></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;">I don't know why I wrote this blog today...I had been staying away from stress as much as possible. But this frustration, this grief as I mourn the death of human decency and kindness I see all around me, compelled me to make this plea. </div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><br /></div><div>Plant a seed, tend your row and <b><i>don't let the assholes win!</i></b></div><div style="font-style: normal; font-weight: normal;"><div></div></div></div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-12797983255415031832011-11-30T11:04:00.002-02:002011-11-30T11:18:35.010-02:00November 30th..The Day of the Mothers<div style="text-align: -webkit-auto;"><span class="Apple-style-span"><br /></span></div><div class="post-header" style="line-height: 1.6; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: 0px; margin-bottom: 1.5em; margin-left: 0px; color: rgb(153, 153, 153); font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; font-size: 14px; text-align: -webkit-auto; background-color: rgb(28, 28, 28); "><div class="post-header-line-1"></div></div><div class="post-body entry-content" id="post-body-8806114043484554828" style="width: 508px; line-height: 1.4; font-size: 15px; position: relative; color: rgb(204, 204, 204); font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; text-align: -webkit-auto; background-color: rgb(28, 28, 28); "><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center; "><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7J3wlLJUUp4DAGaUYB0p8pfLlcYkJk6UzC4e7S0VIKgZ1WyueO_EEpozuR0JSBCLglIreHkP_eVKY60WAvDPEfWTb7tlwvpBMYl4bPMKttAoZquaLncK48CllO9o5A-JS-gY_ig/s1600/strangeandmournful.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="text-decoration: none; color: rgb(255, 153, 0); clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em; "><img border="0" ox="true" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi7J3wlLJUUp4DAGaUYB0p8pfLlcYkJk6UzC4e7S0VIKgZ1WyueO_EEpozuR0JSBCLglIreHkP_eVKY60WAvDPEfWTb7tlwvpBMYl4bPMKttAoZquaLncK48CllO9o5A-JS-gY_ig/s1600/strangeandmournful.jpg" style="border-top-style: none; border-right-style: none; border-bottom-style: none; border-left-style: none; border-width: initial; border-color: initial; position: relative; " /></a></div>Today is National Strange and Mournful Day, an observance that began in response to the designation of November as National Adoption Awareness Month. We mothers wear our ribbons all month and tell anyone who asks what they mean. The last day of the month is an observance of the validity of our motherhood and the dreadful nature of our loss.<br /><br /><br />I came up with the name because certain lyrics from Paul Simon's "Mother and Child Reunion" resonated, so deeply, with me. All through this past month, many Exiled Mothers have been wearing our ribbon badges of black for mourning, red for righteous indignation and passion for our cause and white for hope and healing. Some of us will adorn our ribbons with the birthstones of our children that were taken for adoption. I have a diamond and a pearl for my ribbon....April and June are the months in which I gave birth to, and was forced to surrender, my two oldest children.<br />While we refer to the lyrics of Simon's wonderful tune, this observance is not about reunion, but about the devastating effects of loss to adoption on the mother. I have high-lighted the pertinent lyrics in red and boldface.<br /><br />MOTHER AND CHILD REUNION<br />music and lyrics by Paul Simon<br /><br />No I would not give you false hope, On this strange and mournful day,<br />But the mother and child reu-nion, Is only a motion away,<br /><span style="background-color: red; "><strong>Oh, little darling of mine, I can't for the life of me,</strong></span><br /><span style="background-color: red; "><strong>Remember a sadder day. I know they say let it be,</strong></span><br /><span style="background-color: red; "><strong>But it just don't work out that way. And the course of a lifetime runs,</strong></span><br /><span style="background-color: red; "><strong>Over and over again.</strong></span><br /><strong><br /></strong><br /><br />No I would not give you false hope,On this strange and mournful day,<br />But the mother and child reu-nion, Is only a motion away,<br /><span style="background-color: red; "><strong>Oh, little darling of mine. I just cant believe it's so,</strong></span><br /><span style="background-color: red; "><strong>And though it seems strange to say, I've never been laid so low,</strong></span><br /><span style="background-color: red; "><strong>In such a mysterious way, And the course of a lifetime runs,</strong></span><br /><span style="background-color: red; "><strong>Over and over again.</strong></span><br /><strong><br /></strong><br />But I would not give you false hope, On this strange and mournful day,<br />When the mother and child reu-nion,<br />Is only a motion away.<br /><br /><br />While most of the support groups online for Mothers of adoption loss tend to deal with the ups and downs of reunion (and God/dess knows, it is a rough ride), SMAAC is focused on the pain and injustice of our ordeal leading up to and including the "Strange and Mournful Day" when we realized our babies were lost to us.<br /><br /><br />So today, on the last day of what we now call "Adoption BEwareness Month," we honor ourselves and remember the injustice of the EMS/BSE and renew our determination to be an active and vocal part of bringing justice to the mothers.<br /><br />And to my daughter and my son that were lost to me in those dark days, always know that I loved you and losing you was neither my choice nor my wish. Some day, some how, some one is going to have to make restitution for what was lost to us. Not in dollars, but in acknowledgement, atonement and public awareness of the pain and the dark underbelly of the adoption myth.<br /><br /><br />Happy Strange and Mournful Day, Sisters. I am so sorry you had to suffer this</div><div class="post-body entry-content" id="post-body-8806114043484554828" style="width: 508px; line-height: 1.4; font-size: 15px; position: relative; color: rgb(204, 204, 204); font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; text-align: -webkit-auto; background-color: rgb(28, 28, 28); "> loss.</div><div class="post-body entry-content" id="post-body-8806114043484554828" style="width: 508px; line-height: 1.4; font-size: 15px; position: relative; color: rgb(204, 204, 204); font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; text-align: -webkit-auto; background-color: rgb(28, 28, 28); "><br /></div><div class="post-body entry-content" id="post-body-8806114043484554828" style="width: 508px; line-height: 1.4; font-size: 15px; position: relative; color: rgb(204, 204, 204); font-family: Arial, Tahoma, Helvetica, FreeSans, sans-serif; text-align: -webkit-auto; background-color: rgb(28, 28, 28); ">*I wanted to add this post script to this repeat article. It is just in the last year that I have realized the full import of the loss of my children. I am and will always be their mother. But something twisted happened when they were raised by other people and it is my sad realization that my babies are gone forever. In their place, are people who share my DNA, but not my values or vision or cultural orientation, who look like me, but who don't really know me for who I truly am. Surrender is forever and adoption is the great destroyer of the person that might have been. My children are tied to mothers who never knew them on that deep, cellular level that is the natural connection and to whom they are unrealistically loyal, even after one of those mothers passed away. It doesn't hurt as much as it used to, but it still makes me angry.</div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-73287254269897318072011-11-28T11:45:00.002-02:002011-11-28T11:45:59.640-02:00Guest Post; Potent, Passionate and Political<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtEO4felS8t6TPNq_sGoMjTpZQ6eyN8Lciy6yBNiSO6w-mM-g6N8vAC45unwtl83s2LJySNm97XWwEum5D6SLfBcLgnIWbFJwMA-6SHRt2STbieW2PWnlHrNvEh3nemFs0rf25mA/s1600/anger.bmp" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 72px; height: 94px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhtEO4felS8t6TPNq_sGoMjTpZQ6eyN8Lciy6yBNiSO6w-mM-g6N8vAC45unwtl83s2LJySNm97XWwEum5D6SLfBcLgnIWbFJwMA-6SHRt2STbieW2PWnlHrNvEh3nemFs0rf25mA/s320/anger.bmp" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5680042505276899890" /></a><br /><p><i><b>My daughter, Kerry Henline Klein, sent me this message last night. She is without work and times are hard for her and her Significant Other. Being senior citizens on a fixed income,there is little we can do to help. She finally boiled over and this is the result.</b></i></p><p><br />Between Thanksgiving and now (not to mention everything else going on in my life) I have a lot to think about. Life these days is hard. It's not easy or fun making ends meet day to day for most folks, especially the older generation and those who do the jobs that most consider beneath them. But we do those jobs to live and help those who are retired and we want to make sure they can live the rest of their lives in reasonable comfort. Then there is making sure the children in our lives have food and an education...free education??? YEA RIGHT! Even a college education you work and pay for yourself doesn't mean you will be able to have a good life these days.</p><p>I do remember a day if you worked hard for a day's pay you got a fair day's pay. The last few years I worked for 911 I didn't even get a cost of living raise, yet I had to be there and was expected to neglect my life and family should a huge catastrophic event happen. 9/11 happened... the next few days at 911 dispatch were so quiet. So quiet it was scary. It seems that things have gone to hell from 9/11.</p><p>I'm tired of those with money making more money and thinking they are doing the 99% a favor by giving them a job that can't even pay a month's worth of bills. SCREW YOU! We need Kennedy and Clinton back in office together! Back when they were president even the homeless had a chance to get back on their feet! Republicans did nothing but screw what America is SUPPOSED to be at the behest of their corporate owners.</p><p>I rarely speak my mind on most political or religious issues, but I am sick and tired of being on the bottom of the pile in the 99%! I remember when Clinton was in office.... life was actually better for the "little" people. We are the BACK BONE OF AMERICA! And when the BACK BONE IS happy.... so should the "privileged" be.... but NOOOOO! They are too greedy and selfish and care NOTHING for their fellow HUMANS WHO MAKE SURE THEY HAVE WHAT THEY WANT...NOT NEED! We struggled to have a good Thanksgiving because of CORPORATE-OWNED REPUBLICANS AND CONSERVATIVES! To hell with all of you! I want my life back! All I want to do is earn an honest days wage and live a normal life.That was what America was about to begin with! Pardon me but... SCREW YOU REPUBLICANS AND 1%! I have rights too! And I'll be DAMNED if I won't take them back, even if I have to take them from YOU!</p><p>Start looking over your shoulder... you're about to have to live like a REAL American again.... try WORKING! I'm there and I will bring you down. If something catastrophic were to happen, you would be the 1st to go down.... I have a good chance of surviving.... screw you. 1%... you are screwing yourself by breaking the nation's backbone! That backbone will bite back and take what THEY MADE. You sure as hell didn't nor could you do the really hard stuff! You'd BEST think really hard or you will eventually regret it.</p><p>This, from one of the 99%, is a promise... not a threat...a promise. Sleep tight asshats, republicans and the just plain ignorant idiots born with a silver spoon. There will be a day of reckoning, and that silver spoon won't mean S***! And who will you depend on to survive???? Think about it dumbasses. I know I will... I doubt you will, if I have a say in it.</p><p>I need my teeth taken care of... I can't come up with the $3000 to have them pulled much less the money for my choppers! I need glasses... I can't pay the $500 bill to get an exam and a decent pair of glasses so I can see properly. I need to go to my DR for other health reasons too many to mention... I IGNORE THEM! If I end up with cancer.... guess what... I die in pain cause I have no insurance. Bet I won't even get a Tylenol to ease the pain as if it will do any good.</p><p>Because I actually will work instead of thinking my fellow humans are farm animals to be used, this is my future. Let the tables turn... I would LOVE to see the 1% hold their own! LOLOL!!!! Plant a field...harvest a field... YEAH RIGHT! Sweep a floor, wash your own clothes, grow your own food, prepare your own meals, take care of a medical issue with a little common sense. The 1% could NOT survive without the 99%! Watch out the 1%.... you are going to be in for a RUDE awakening soon! We will NOT allow you to run us down or treat us as slave labor. Our founding Fathers would be sooooo ashamed of you! America is supposed to be a chance for one and all.... you're trying make it a Hitler-type fascist state!</p><p>Just wait until you have no one to wipe your ass when you're sick, or cook your food or feed you or grow/buy your food.... you get the drift. Try hemming and mending your own clothes...I dare you. Yes... I'M F****** PISSED AND HAVE HAD ENOUGH! I'm tired of not being able to do simple things that the 1% toss around like candy. Oh... GAS IN MY CAR! FOOD ON MY TABLE! FIX MY CAR! GO TO THE DR! A NEEDED NEW PAIR OF SHOES, A BADLY NEEDED NEW BRA! Need I go on???? I've had it... the gloves are off.</p><p><br /></p><p><b><i>My daughter is proud and has always worked for what she needed. She just wants a chance to work and make the money she needs to live. This is not what I envisioned for my children. I understand your anger, Pooh. I am angry, too and my heart hurts for you. I love you.</i></b></p><div><b><i><br /></i></b></div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com19tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-85930024063725853832011-11-27T10:35:00.007-02:002011-11-28T16:18:55.348-02:00INCOMING!!<div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBK0OVCwJ9bk-OmruVW0-6hdyjJ7WHp2HHKiDU7UHjxUd3TT9EByAxmwC58G4hKAsbZSYRiEnyR15qMtCCU8UICvOXglV-rmEmwHmpKxs4oRk00HZtR2Wuea9AJ_ILT9rfo1NyMQ/s1600/bitterbomb.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="margin: 0px 10px 10px 0px; width: 320px; height: 306px; float: left; cursor: pointer;" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5679655909022574722" border="0" alt="" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgBK0OVCwJ9bk-OmruVW0-6hdyjJ7WHp2HHKiDU7UHjxUd3TT9EByAxmwC58G4hKAsbZSYRiEnyR15qMtCCU8UICvOXglV-rmEmwHmpKxs4oRk00HZtR2Wuea9AJ_ILT9rfo1NyMQ/s320/bitterbomb.jpg" /></a><br /><div>Ah, it is that time again. As we approach the end of November and the Strange and Mournful aspect of our observation of this heinous month of adoption idolatry, another adopter/facilitator/good adoptee searches for, and finds, my old post about<a href="http://motherhooddeleted.blogspot.com/2009/09/what-anti-adoption-means.html"> what anti-adoption really means.</a></div><div><br /></div><div> </div><div>"GB's Mom" is the latest of the irate, pro-adoption souls to lob the "bitter bomb" at me without even knowing me. GB, in answer to your "comment," you go ahead and stay in your world, as you put it, and I am sorry you are so willfully clueless. </div><div><br /></div><div>Here is said comment and you should be honored that I gave it this much attention: <i>"<a title="http://www.blogger.com/profile/08866513131959998883" href="http://www.blogger.com/profile/08866513131959998883">GB's Mom</a> has left a new comment on your post "<a title="http://motherhooddeleted.blogspot.com/2009/09/what-anti-adoption-means.html" href="http://motherhooddeleted.blogspot.com/2009/09/what-anti-adoption-means.html">What Anti-Adoption Means</a>": I am sorry you are so bitter. You stay in your world, I will stay in mine." </i>Well, Hell. That sounds like a deal!<i> </i></div><div><br /></div><div> </div><div>Sometimes I see, in these frustrated adoption defenders, the 6-year-old, arguing with classmates and holding on to the myth of Santa Clause for dear life. A glimpse of the true pain that comes with this unnatural separation is too much for some to take. They hold on to the Industry mythology like a life ring in a sea of turbulent truth. The only defense they have is to call us "bitter." AND each one that does so thinks that they are the original with that assessment and are so proud of their <em>bon mot. </em>I tend to get the giggles, now, when I see that "bitter" bomb flying through the air only to be a dud when it lands.</div><div><br /></div><div> </div><div>It would be right to call us angry. We have a right to that anger. We were screwed by more than the fathers of our babies. We were placed into the maw of a beast...the social service and adoption industry...and left to sink into compliance by coercion. Not a great way to spend a big chunk of your younger years, I might add. And not a single person has stepped up to acknowledge the injustice that was done to us and to our infants. But we are also survivors who love, laugh and live. This battle is a PART of our lives. It is not the sum total of our lives.</div><div><br /></div><div> </div><div>GB's (Can I call you GB's?), don't confuse righteous anger and a desire for justice and change with bitterness. Of course, if you follow that advice, you might learn something you don't want to know. Meanwhile, I have a life, with husband, children, doggies, family and friends whom I love and who love me. I guess they like the taste of "bitter." We're riding out to the coast, today. Excuse me while I go enjoy my bitter life. (That's sarcasm, I say, that's sarcasm, kid!) *giggle</div></div><div><br /></div><div>I JUST HAD TO ADD THIS ONE: Someone commented;"Anonymous (of course) has left a new comment on your post "<a title="http://motherhooddeleted.blogspot.com/2011/11/incoming.html" href="http://motherhooddeleted.blogspot.com/2011/11/incoming.html">INCOMING!!</a>": </div><br /><i>@1:30 Anon: I don't know about her older kids, but I don't think she "purchased her babies from a baby broker." The younger child is from a disrupted adoption. The older child has FASD, among other medical issues. Perhaps the mother that chose to drink excessively during pregnancy wasn't fit to parent?<br /><br />I understand your pain, I really do, but I don't think she is representative of people that buy babies. I don't think she is the face of your anger. If anything, she is doing a service, taking in (dare I say "unwanted?") children with special needs. I am sure you two can find much to disagree about, but I don't think she should be the object of your scorn for parenting these children. </i><br /><div><i><br /></i></div><div>To which I must say; That's all well and good. But GB'sMom CAME HERE FIRST, with the 'bitter bomb' insult. She got what she deserved. It seems that it is OK for adopters to make any nasty judgment of mothers and those of us who really "felt the pain," but nothing should be said in return? I think not, Anonymous. And, what effort was really made to help any of the families of said children? Do you know anything beyond what she and the social workers have said? If you don't think she should receive any criticism, then you might want to advise her against making such comment about people she doesn't know. RKW</div><div><br /></div><div>Lisi...I didn't troll GBM's blog. Anyone can reference any open URL on the 'net. As far as I am concerned, this didn't start with me but it ends HERE. On to other things. RKW</div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-14343094408098550702011-11-01T09:52:00.005-02:002011-11-01T10:39:49.904-02:00Headaches and Heartaches<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1xl29J-j-MW4RFH8VO0E0XIqUkhLSZ3biWN82o5vEse70bhJL91htUZTHB13RXEqsuMdvMPywcBL8jymsWbKe5V0bhly25dX0dUwU1YRrn_D-MzPobBlMcHhXv_DNadIE2sJShg/s1600/strangeandmournful.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 225px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh1xl29J-j-MW4RFH8VO0E0XIqUkhLSZ3biWN82o5vEse70bhJL91htUZTHB13RXEqsuMdvMPywcBL8jymsWbKe5V0bhly25dX0dUwU1YRrn_D-MzPobBlMcHhXv_DNadIE2sJShg/s320/strangeandmournful.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5670004036645517234" /></a><br />I have been sadly remiss in posting, this past month. Between health issues, concerns for family members and the national angst we are all experiencing, the issues of adoption just seemed to take a big, back seat with me. I have had to deal with headaches and heartaches of the personal variety. Adoption is still not numero uno on my agenda, but November has reared its ugly head and National Adoption Awareness Month is upon us. I gag as I type.<div><br /></div><div>My friend, Musing Mother, posted a very relevant and insightful piece on the plight of Mothers from our era. <a href="http://musing-mother.blogspot.com/2011/10/dia-de-los-madres.html">La Dia de los Madres</a> is a take on the Mexican Day of the Dead and that is how I and many others felt after our journey through the surrender of our infants to the adoption machine, back in the day.</div><div><br /></div><div>I can't help but link those feeling to the feelings many are beginning to experience just being middle-class and poor Americans. We have awakened to the fact that we have taken much for granted and while we were doing so, the greed machine was working overtime. Now, substitute your flesh and blood, the child you carried inside you for nine months, for that lost job, home, income and self-esteem, and you get the picture.</div><div><br /></div><div>I have my "I am the 99%" button, but I will also be wearing it next to my "Strange and Mournful" ribbon (pictured). I am unable to camp out in downtown Orlando, but I have spent some time there with the local "Occupy Group." I hope there are those who will ask me about my ribbon when I return to wave a sign for a couple of hours. I have some good analogies to use for their edification.</div><div><br /></div><div>I have always loved November. The promise of approaching winter, the smell of dry leaves on the ground, Thanksgiving with feasting and family...all have special significance for me. But along came this co-opting of one of my favorite months by the adoption machine, adherents and fans and they are doing their best to ruin this month. Well, I won't let them!</div><div><br /></div><div>November will always be those things I love, PLUS, it will also still be "National Adoption Bewareness Month." Let the one-percenters who reap the bloody booty of the adoption industry put that one in their turkey and stuff it! If there ever was an example of the misuse and abuse of capitalism, adoption, the traffic in human children is it. The nation of the bottom line has brought us to a new low, but it was well on its way in the Era of Mass Surrenders (EMS and/or BSE) . </div><div><br /></div><div>Let's hope the turn of events on a national level will allow for open minds on this issue for a change. The brainwashing the public has received that allowed this financial fiasco is no different from the mythology they have been force-fed about adoption. Just like Wall Street, Citizens United, The Tea Party and the Dominionists, Big Adoption is just about as harmless and benign as a nest of angry rattlesnakes. And, as many recent news stories from both here and abroad have proven, this Industry is just as corrupt as the rest.</div><div><br /></div><div>Corrupt, greedy, entitlements for the self-entitled, all these apply. But I will not let this entity take my November from me. I think I will make a new sign to wave. How about, "Screwed by Big Adoption?" Meanwhile, in the vernacular of my generation, I will continue to groove on MY November.</div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-86074204135562567012011-10-03T14:39:00.005-02:002011-10-03T15:23:04.494-02:00What's Really Important?<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5YZY58r2rpHKbPDmmtRVr39hMppu8Mp3nWx7umTawCfgF5hyphenhyphenLszjjmzhkLohHuIoeqHNi3Nwmw47uPogLsZgEhrNIyNYX7ZSFxQoqKMjtP2TnX_soCYqWagJ7HvNXJS7gEXC_wQ/s1600/occupy.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 212px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi5YZY58r2rpHKbPDmmtRVr39hMppu8Mp3nWx7umTawCfgF5hyphenhyphenLszjjmzhkLohHuIoeqHNi3Nwmw47uPogLsZgEhrNIyNYX7ZSFxQoqKMjtP2TnX_soCYqWagJ7HvNXJS7gEXC_wQ/s320/occupy.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5659311840458418242" /></a><br />I have had little to nothing to say about THE issue of adoption in the past few posts. It is hard for some mothers and adoptees to understand, but, at this point, adoption is the last thing on my mind. Like millions of others, I am holding on to my last shred of hope that we will survive this unrest, corruption and intrusion into our government by greed and religion. I know it has been happening for a while, now, but I was one of those who really believed it would never get this far.<div><br /></div><div>One thing I do know is that there is little to no hope for adoption "reform" and uniform open records if we get a president out of the current batch of Republican wannabes. Even the undeclared GOP candidates make me shudder when I think of them taking the reins of the executive branch. The Congress is a playground for a bunch of greedy children and the future of our nation as the great country it was is in doubt.</div><div><br /></div><div>Funny how pet causes and personal interest causes can take a back seat when basic survival becomes an issue. People had criticized the "Occupy" movement, saying it is unfocused and unorganized. I have read the mission statement from the <a href="http://occupywallst.org/">Occupy Wall Street</a> organization and it is very coherent and inclusive. A visit to the <a href="https://www.facebook.com/OccupyWallSt?sk=info">Facebook Page</a> and to the links provided will give anyone with questions a lot of good information. This and the upcoming election are the issues that now consume me.</div><div><br /></div><div>It is imperative to me that we keep corporate greed and ANY religion out of our government. I watched the first part of the PBS documentary on Prohibition last night and the folly of trying to legislate religious morality by altering the constitution or making such laws was made clear. Before anyone tries to point out the Civil Rights act, let me stress that there is a difference between making bigotry illegal, an impossible task, and making laws giving all people a right to a decent life. That is what is ethical, not what is dogmatically moral.</div><div><br /></div><div>The lack of ethics in the financial community and Congress got us into this mess WITH OUR PERMISSION. You say you didn't give your permission? Well, every time we don't vote, or we don't take the time to educate ourselves about a candidate or issue or we depend on sound bites and whatever someone else says to make a political decision, we are handing the government over to these entities. </div><div><br /></div><div>Now, a lot of good people, who are deeply into their religion, are giving knee-jerk approval to the Dominionists who are hand in glove with the Corporations in wanting to make the government theirs. Our way of life is not all that is at stake. Our most precious and personal rights are in danger of being destroyed by those who would re-fashion the Constitution to suit them. </div><div><br /></div><div>For a long time, I thought that the populace was too smart to let these theocrats and fat cats pull one over on them. But the rise (and the slow fall) of the Tea Party has persuaded me that I have given many of my fellow Americans too much credit in the common sense department. The main stream media now relates to its audience on about an eighth-grade level. No longer champions of the truth, the media has bowed to its corporate ownership and watered down its message. Education and penal institutions are in the process of being privatized. The dumbing down of America is almost complete.</div><div><br /></div><div>I don't want this to be the kind of world left to my four great-grandchildren. I am sick of watching my children, who should have been able to do better with their lives than their parents, struggling to hold on along with millions of other. And I am tired of hearing obnoxious media pundits, both religious and political, spouting ignorance and nonsense for the consumption of those who don't want to use the good brain with which Nature endowed them.</div><div><br /></div><div>What is really important is that we save our nation from the Big Corporate and Theological Brothers and ourselves from a slide into ignorance. It's a simple matter of survival.</div><div><br /></div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-28409386990924459582011-09-24T17:39:00.003-02:002011-09-24T18:16:29.371-02:00They're There! Where's The Media?<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEioTLv_90HIePFc4Qrm9fitrciV0zySwCpUXUkBkqx6rb2LulBMetbUzYwAVe5UyHF69KEjolcCIGcoN4jWn5TZ9alLK1UWcSltOxr0cMviEoIWzf0DbKzz2q0p-rVc7-U4SrI8zg/s1600/wallstmarchers.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 200px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEioTLv_90HIePFc4Qrm9fitrciV0zySwCpUXUkBkqx6rb2LulBMetbUzYwAVe5UyHF69KEjolcCIGcoN4jWn5TZ9alLK1UWcSltOxr0cMviEoIWzf0DbKzz2q0p-rVc7-U4SrI8zg/s320/wallstmarchers.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5656021794910995234" /></a><br />Last Saturday, 2000 people occupied and marched on Wall Street. They have camped out in a park. They are standing up and speaking out for the majority of us who can't be there. This is no longer "life as usual" people. Yet, there was no coverage on any of the major news programs.<div><br /></div><div>We need to complain to the mainstream media. They will cover the nasty little Westboro Baptist bunch, sometimes numbering less than 15 people when they spew their homophobic hatred at the funerals of our service people. But 2000 people, assembling peacefully to see that the truth is heard..they are suspiciously silent. Is this coming from the top where media moguls are wanting these folks to go away, unheard?</div><div><br /></div><div>This is a movement that is spreading, a movement that doesn't have the deep pockets of corporate mercenaries behind it. It is you and me and young people who can't find jobs and the elderly who are watching their hopes for a dignified retirement drift away. I worry about where all this is headed, but I admire and support them for their efforts. </div><div><br /></div><div>We are living in a time when, in the name of greed and dogma, people are willing to see our government and our nation go down for the count. We are seeing, to our shame, the man holding the most important position in the free world being treated with disrespect and hostility. And yet he remains a gentleman.</div><div><br /></div><div>For those whose attention is still solely on adoption issues, let me add my opinion here, for what it is worth. If one of the GOP candidates is nominated and elected, the chances for real reform, open records and the rights of single mothers will go down the tubes. You might as well kiss that goodbye, especially if one of the Tea Party Darlings is elected.</div><div><br /></div><div>Three years ago, I was elated and joyful that our nation seemed to have overcome racism to the point that we would elect a well-qualified man of mixed race to the Presidency. Now I realize that there were a lot of good old boys and girls who didn't think it would happen and the hatred boiled to the surface. Now I am fearful, for the President, for our nation, for my family, my loved ones and my friends. Something nasty is happening.</div><div><br /></div><div>The hatred of the teabaggers is a festering boil on the face of the USA. If we seemed ugly to the outside world before, just combine corporate interests with the racism and adamant fundamentalism of the baggers and you have the end of freedom, the Constitution, and life as we know it and our downfall will be very public and very disgraceful. Poverty and hunger will make rebels of many, and corpses of more.</div><div><br /></div><div>Doomsday scenarios are not easy to take, and I am not saying that the world will end, but it will definitely change, for the worse, if the Republican/Tea Party/ALEC Power Brokers get their way. We can only stop this from happening by making a lot of very public noise and making enough of it that we can't be ignored. The people occupying Wall Street need our support. So here are a few email addresses and phone numbers through which the national media can be contacted. This is just the TV news departments. You can also easily Google the big-name newspapers and they have email addresses to send letters to the editors.</div><div><br /></div><div>ABC News: <a href="mailto:netaudr@abc.com">netaudr@abc.com</a> </div><div>CBS News: Phone: 212-975-4321</div><div>CNBC: <a href="mailto:info@cnbc.com">info@cnbc.com</a> </div><div>CNN:<a href="mailto:cnn.feedback@cnn.com">cnn.feedback@cnn.com</a></div><div>MSNBC: <a href="mailto:world@msnbc.com">world@msnbc.com</a> </div><div>NBC: 212-664-4444</div><div>PBS/Newshour With Jim Leherer: <a href="mailto:newshour@pbs.org">newshour@pbs.org</a> </div><div><br /></div><div>Let's get these reporters out there covering this story. I don't want to see these people leave, dejected and feeling they have failed us. Help them.</div><div><br /></div><div> </div><div><br /></div><!--?/color-->Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-8250769177457895502011-09-23T12:17:00.004-02:002011-09-23T13:23:23.639-02:00Dear Republicans<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9lKLGsv1LUGV8-gs4Vb8zXuPts8f7OzmmjhpYbSgmKmXXjpWIjh18uGwEaUzAjefMxB6CuKWAB3VVtE_3uEXhYeu7SmsVyzUEQcByQ1f5kZFswI9SwHyPXJDEAYEY1BqfOR-tMQ/s1600/GOP-Debate+%25281%2529.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:right; margin:0 0 10px 10px;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 213px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj9lKLGsv1LUGV8-gs4Vb8zXuPts8f7OzmmjhpYbSgmKmXXjpWIjh18uGwEaUzAjefMxB6CuKWAB3VVtE_3uEXhYeu7SmsVyzUEQcByQ1f5kZFswI9SwHyPXJDEAYEY1BqfOR-tMQ/s320/GOP-Debate+%25281%2529.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5655569723739703234" /></a><br />Dear Republicans, <div><br /></div><div>I'm not sure, but I hope I am writing this to a group of real people. You see, I probably am a naive idealist, but I have to think that there has to be a way to get the realities of life across to you. I am a senior citizen. Yet, I still have hope that there is compassion and decency in the vast majority of human beings.</div><div><br /></div><div>I know you don't want there to be a Democratic president. I fear you REALLY don't want a mixed-race, Democratic president more than anything. But is it fair for you to engineer an economic disaster that will take us all down, except for those of you who are wealthy, just to try to destroy one man? And why do you seem to think that none of us see what is happening and why? I feel, somehow, disrespected as a person, a woman and a senior by the tactics you are using. I am neither blind, brainwashed or ignorant. </div><div><br /></div><div>In my lifetime, I have seen statesmanship left behind and replaced with political idealogues, I have seen the incremental destruction of everything socially and politically good that came out of the first 70 years of the last century. There are babies out there, on the ground, crying because they have been thrown out with the bathwater. I have seen the decline of truth and the rise of the spin doctor. I have seen a nation grown so lazy that they depend on media sound bites rather than researching the candidates before voting. I have seen an educational system so crippled that it is turning out functional illiterates.</div><div><br /></div><div>I started out as an activist in the area of adoption, specifically, coerced surrenders of the Era of Mass Surrenders. I always looked in wonder at the attitude of adopters or PAPs who felt they were entitled to the child of another woman, just because they wanted one. Now I see where they get it. Most of you are attorneys that have been elected to Congress and I have never seen such a bunch of self-entitled people in my life, except, perhaps, the corporations and financial fat cats and hedge funders that line your pockets.</div><div><br /></div><div>Yet you call the pittance that we have worked for and paid into all our working lives an "entitlement?" I call Social Security a promise and a deal. I call Medicare necessary and paid for with OUR money. And I call social programs that help feed, house and educate the less fortunate among us, especially children, COMPASSION. </div><div><br /></div><div>Capitalism, on its own, is a ravenous beast that consumes and acquires with no thought of consequences. Without social programs to balance things out, our system becomes even more corrupt and ugly than it already is. We WILL fight for the social conscience that keeps our nation from becoming a complete corporate-owned plutocracy and theocracy.</div><div><br /></div><div>And yes, while we are at it, what IS IT with this evangelical overload? Not only have many of your number thrown the Constitution to the ground, but with this aspect, you tread all over it with mud on your shoes. America is a nation of multiple beliefs and non-beliefs and it should remain that way. I don't think "freedom of religion" means just freedom for one segment of believers. </div><div><br /></div><div>President Obama has offered the olive branch more than once and you have hurled it back in his face. Oh you good Christians, you. He has offered programs to help our nation and you look, not at the merits of the program (similar to many passed in bipartisan actions over the years) but at the source of that program and you sneer and reject. We want that program. We need it. But you are in that "my way or the highway" groove.</div><div><br /></div><div>I know a lot of self-proclaimed Republicans that seem to be decent people and they are looking somewhat embarrassed, these days. They still puff up and flash their "Nobama" buttons, but they are wondering what happened to their 401Ks and retirement as well. And they are not real keen on Social Security cuts or Medicare cutbacks. You're walking a slippery slope with those subjects.</div><div><br /></div><div>You want us to blame President Obama for his predecessor's excesses and your stubborn pique and that's not representing the people. That is a vendetta and not a pretty one. Maybe you need to step back and remember that you, whether you are well to do or not, are just one of the herd and that the strength of the working class makes or breaks any nation.</div><div><br /></div><div>Of course, I look at the picture of the current GOP candidates and find myself, an agnostic, praying that none of these people defeat the President next year. That would probably put an end to my American citizenship. I have lost trust in you and in your motivations. So hope you don't win 2012 or you will have a nasty situation on your hands. Hungry, desperate people can get angry and determined. </div><div><br /></div><div>I'll just get out if I can, should that happen. I'm too old for your nonsense. Here's some truth for you. </div><div><br /></div><div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEid66JSigWWCCyTg2aTM5CmyI20o7KI2nBqdjlRz3qBhgEkn1esILDD4GtCkcobAG3XkNbEaCCg-zZWeFuHbc9JmQwgX4UW9hMg03Hr9Xgw9cnN-CPXUy3GR7B1PvPUYkzTOCOZMw/s1600/More+truth.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEid66JSigWWCCyTg2aTM5CmyI20o7KI2nBqdjlRz3qBhgEkn1esILDD4GtCkcobAG3XkNbEaCCg-zZWeFuHbc9JmQwgX4UW9hMg03Hr9Xgw9cnN-CPXUy3GR7B1PvPUYkzTOCOZMw/s320/More+truth.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5655575441159565698" style="cursor: pointer; width: 320px; height: 233px; " /></a></div><div><br /></div><div>Sincerely,</div><div><br /></div><div>Robin Kinney Westbrook</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-34869997397113821422011-09-10T09:51:00.004-02:002011-09-10T10:29:30.750-02:00Legacy of Greed and Arrogance<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6dtEF1rbyKOSctJ-E3lDiVNQudmQksVWq4r85eZh0EXPEQb42VORQPdlGfU_UShuezECTcmhuuL0WYhPyxDfPSLiUeomLHMAOeZWPHRidgzqsvZU3wbCpVj7kZl1tlgRGnoM8dQ/s1600/9-11_tribute.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 240px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6dtEF1rbyKOSctJ-E3lDiVNQudmQksVWq4r85eZh0EXPEQb42VORQPdlGfU_UShuezECTcmhuuL0WYhPyxDfPSLiUeomLHMAOeZWPHRidgzqsvZU3wbCpVj7kZl1tlgRGnoM8dQ/s320/9-11_tribute.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5650697507288157186" /></a><div>9/11 has left us with a curious and terrifying legacy; asshats, motherf***ers, and bullsh***ers as far as the eye can see, bad things happening to good people, bad people getting all the dough and all the power, and good people watching their homes burn or washed away in a flood and people in Africa starving while a bunch of pin-headed, self-righteous redneck, evangelical elitists and greedy power-mongers glad-hand, campaign and make back-room deals. </div><div><br /></div><div>These influence brokers used the fear generated by the cowardly attacks of 9/11, ten years ago, to erode our freedoms and break the back of our government. Bin Laden got what he wanted.</div><div><br /></div><div>Racist bullies, liars and hypocrites sit in their snug little ivory towers and rain down hate rhetoric. Inane/insane pundits burst our eardrums with their messages of hate....This goes beyond party and philosophy and into the heart of the human race where it is festering and about to blow. They wanted to use fear to control the populace. Well, good job, Sh**eaters! I am definitely afraid. But controlled? Not yet.</div><div><br /></div><div>I fear a return to the dark ages, an elite class that celebrates the ignorance and fear of the masses while they control access to everything that makes life better...education, creativity, art, music, freedom. I fear a time when the public becomes nothing more than voiceless drones. I fear a bloody rebellion, a destruction of something so precious, lost because it was taken for granted.</div><div><br /></div><div>I see the seething anger and/or the exhausted resignation of the millions who just want to work for a living. I see a wife entering a church to ask for food. I see a man gathering scrap metal so that he can sell it to buy gas to look for work. I see elderly people wondering if they will die in poverty. </div><div><br /></div><div>And I see a large dark cloud harboring a hideous, tentacled, Lovecraftian monster with many faces; Koch, Murdoch, Bush, Perry, Beck, Coulter, Rove, Cheney, Palin, Bachmann, Robertson, Cain, Paul, Devos, Exxon Mobile and tar sand blasters, pipeline runners and mountain cappers...not enough room to list all of the dastards.</div><div><br /></div><div>I see book-burning, church-run "education" and emotions, especially love in any form, outlawed and punishable by law. Orwell just had the year wrong. Atwood is a visionary as well. History and literature have warned us but we haven't heeded the warnings and are beginning to pay the price. "Those who forget the past are doomed to repeat it."</div><div><br /></div><div>Ten years ago, we saw the results of hate and religious fanaticism. It cost the lives of thousands of innocent people and left a scar on the face of our nation. I find it absolutely flabbergasting that the parallels are not recognized in the antics of Robertson, the Tea Party and praying candidates who fall to their knees while their states burn. Fascism isn't socialism, People!! It's intolerance and fear and iron control and fanaticism and it isn't just Islam that has a claim to those attributes. It is here in the fundamentalist, evangelical, end-of-timers Christian Dominionists and we should fear them just as much as the Arab piloting an airliner. There is an ACTIVE campaign to replace Democracy with control through fear, and to replace the Constitution with the bible. And YES, that would be a bad thing!!!</div><div><br /></div><div>My time is coming soon, when I won't have to worry about it. I am in my "golden years" (*snort) and the worse will probably come after I am dead and gone. But I have children, grandchildren and great-grandchildren and a legacy of ignorance, fear and poverty is not what I would want for them. </div><div><br /></div><div>For every time I didn't speak up, for the times when I was younger when I was too self-involved and reacted rather than researched, for all the votes I didn't cast because I was too "busy," I am so sorry, my Dear Ones. As long as I still have breath in me, I will protest and write letters and keep the DC switchboards buzzing. I will support that which speaks to the rights of all and fight that which gives the best to a few. </div><div><br /></div><div>I just hope we aren't too few, too late.</div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-53820537209480900272011-09-05T11:06:00.003-02:002011-09-05T12:29:25.846-02:00Distilling Knowledge<div>
<br /></div><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0QbYD7l2CoRhfyaUgwpWTIjMJGNt0uo5O_tvSU0O8ohLsCfY2vTNeJwEFz_K3oYYgITgREXp9xHlECiTIa-JDzmcPZStj6guj-S1eL2sl_HwNHZo73kIXsB6McXF0e2J7EuQnrQ/s1600/raisedkiddos.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="text-align: left;display: block; margin-top: 0px; margin-right: auto; margin-bottom: 10px; margin-left: auto; cursor: pointer; width: 221px; height: 166px; " src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0QbYD7l2CoRhfyaUgwpWTIjMJGNt0uo5O_tvSU0O8ohLsCfY2vTNeJwEFz_K3oYYgITgREXp9xHlECiTIa-JDzmcPZStj6guj-S1eL2sl_HwNHZo73kIXsB6McXF0e2J7EuQnrQ/s320/raisedkiddos.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5648875945316266498" /></a><div style="text-align: center;"><b> Kerry and Sam...1990 </b> </div><div><div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>When I first reunited with my surrendered daughter and then my son, I knew that I was entering a strange land. All the maternal feelings were there, but there were kinks in the chain. Little did I understand at the time, or for years, how that gap in years, and missing out on sharing their childhoods would dash any expectations of a normal relationship and cause a lot of hurt and frustration.<div>
<br /></div><div>I can see jealousy in my surrendered children, towards their siblings...not hostile but wistful that my raised children have something with me that they don't. It speaks to the importance of shared experience. </div><div>
<br /></div><div>You see, my raised children, Kerry and Sam, were my babies, then my toddlers, then my little girl and little boy, then my rebellious teens before they became my adult children. I can recall, with them, special moments, traumas and happy times. My surrendered children were my babies and then they were gone. All the in-between was lost and I admit to searching, hungrily, in their faces for the children they were rather than the adults they now are. That was MY bad.</div><div>
<br /></div><div>In 1993, I was hit by a storm of emotion and confusion, with two reunions in one year, just as I was going though a very tough time in my marriage. It took me a long time to accept and mourn the fact that what I had lost would never be returned. Those precious formative years belonged to someone else. And to say I was displeased with what took place with my babies during those years would be an understatement.</div><div>
<br /></div><div>I tend to over-analyze a lot. And often, I have to stand back and quit going around my arse to get to my elbow. Accepting what I can't change has always been a challenge for me, but I find myself in a much better state of mind when I do that very thing. </div><div>
<br /></div><div>Yes, I am the Mother of the two children lost to adoption...their true Mother. <b><i>But they are not, nor will they ever be my little girl and little boy.</i></b> Those years will always belong to someone else.</div><div>
<br /></div><div>My daughter's adopters are deceased, but they are still a living presence in her. She often posts tributes to them on her FB page. Now that is not the norm for children raised by their natural parents, but what the hey...whatever floats her boat. I just cannot read those paeans without feeling a bit of a knife in my gut. I have to wonder if that is why she does it.</div><div>
<br /></div><div>I feel the family connection more keenly through my granddaughter and her children. I wasn't there when she was a baby, but then lots of grandparents weren't. Our relationship is easier, laughter comes to us more readily and we don't try to burden each other with our troubles. And she gave me a gift when we visited while I was in San Antonio....the gift of her truth and the verification of a lot of my suppositions. The weight of the world was lifted from my shoulders.</div><div>
<br /></div><div>Now I know that in any dysfunctional family, the truth is usually somewhere in the middle. But this is the first time I have really listened to my granddaughter and heard her pain and frustration. Once I had boiled down all this information to the inner essence, I knew that I had to distance myself from a toxic relationship. I would do no one any good by enabling them. </div><div>
<br /></div><div>So here I sit, on Labor Day, having been greeted by my raised children and my granddaughter, and getting on with the bigger fish I have to fry. We have to figure out how to make our move to WV, on hold for four years, now, due to a badly damaged economy and corrupt, political shenanigans. We also have to re-work our budget, deal with the expenses we have without incurring any more and make sure we are covered, health-wise. One of my raised children is going through a terrible time and needs a strong shoulder on which to cry. Oh Bla Di, Oh Bla Da and all that.</div><div>
<br /></div><div>And even that pales when I remember riding through the countryside of Texas, to the west of San Antonio, and seeing the devastation of drought and heat that is ruining the livelihood of millions. I watch the news when I feel especially brave and I have to do what little I can to aid in preventing our Nation from going completely down the tubes greased by greed and arrogance. I can write, I can vote and I can talk. Like I said..bigger fish to fry. </div><div>
<br /></div><div>And as the song says, "You got your troubles, I got mine." My little girl and little boy were taken from me and I have accepted that. And maybe that tragedy will be a learning tool for someone else and a preventative from falling into the same trap. Instead, I am concentrating on what I do have, and I am one fortunate woman. I need to remind myself of that on a continuing basis. </div><div>
<br /></div><div>Sometimes, you just have to boil it all down to the basics, distill your knowledge and go with the essence. Simple, but not easy...but then the simplest truths are never easy to take.</div><div>
<br /></div><div>
<br /></div></div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-80325097898773899652011-08-24T17:48:00.004-02:002011-08-24T21:44:57.350-02:00Life Is.......<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEioj7iPTh7-sJJweQuiPCyrXCkGfc2zvEJw0HPPR7XoFoFLH8wPWYc9bfBQb6uomsrRkXrKI5HSgP6NOc2uVUgU141UgWRSZSfk_boAl-pvbq_GhP7yAmHTHb3bg12BUw2EsTllUg/s1600/aging.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 300px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEioj7iPTh7-sJJweQuiPCyrXCkGfc2zvEJw0HPPR7XoFoFLH8wPWYc9bfBQb6uomsrRkXrKI5HSgP6NOc2uVUgU141UgWRSZSfk_boAl-pvbq_GhP7yAmHTHb3bg12BUw2EsTllUg/s320/aging.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5644512615222044066" /></a>
<br />When I was small, my first memories are of being held, coddled and played with by my parents and my relatives and I thought, "Life is warm and caring." <div>
<br /></div><div>When my father left us in my fifth year, and I watched my mother cry, I thought, "Life is scary and troubling."</div><div>
<br /></div><div>When I suffered a severe burn on my hand as a child, I thought, "Life is physical pain."</div><div>
<br /></div><div>When I would play with my toys or my sisters and friends, I thought, "Life is fun."</div><div>
<br /></div><div>In school, I thought, "Life is working and learning."</div><div>
<br /></div><div>When I approached and reached puberty, I thought, "Life is confusing and full of strange feelings and thoughts."</div><div>
<br /></div><div>When I became interested in boys and had my first serious boyfriend, I thought, "Life is being in love."</div><div>
<br /></div><div>When I was a single, pregnant teen, sent away by my family, abandoned by my lover, alone, frightened and told I was unfit to raise my own baby, I thought, "Life is about debasement, loss and shame."</div><div>
<br /></div><div>Each time I gave birth and felt that wonderful feeling when I held my child, I thought, "Life is about fleeting moments of joy."</div><div>
<br /></div><div>When I met, married and lived, day to day, with my wonderful husband, I thought, "Life is mature, comfortable yet still exciting love."</div><div>
<br /></div><div>As I struggled on, as we all must, through all the different highs and lows of life, I learned that life is all of that and more...joy, grief, peace, worry, fun, fear, loss, serendipity and epiphanies. Some manage life better than others. Some can't deal with it at all and decided to opt out. Others in my life have shown me the meaning of courage, self-honesty and, as my late aunt put it, "keeping on, keeping on." My husband honors his lost child by making his life the best one he can make.</div><div>
<br /></div><div>But the most important thing is that I think life is worth living. In all its joys and sorrows, it is a miracle created by the Universe and something which each person makes as good as they want it to be despite the pitfalls.</div><div>
<br /></div><div>But that good life can only be made in the environment of true freedom, where with rights come responsibilities to each other and our world and where each person is free from ANY kind of oppression, be it physical, financial or spiritual. We must be free from the dogma of the self-righteous. We must be free from ignorance, want and hunger. We must be free to learn, to explore and to be enriched by art, science, literature and music. </div><div>
<br /></div><div>That is why we must not let the direction that is being taken by the extremist Right determine our future. We must say NO to fascism in the name of religion and NO to corporate person-hood and the idea of alms to the rich. I don't know about any of you, but none of my family, friends and associates are named Exxon Mobile. We must continue to say NO to racism and the encroaching idea of a Christian theocracy. This country was founded by people who felt strongly that the Church and the State should always be separated by law and logic.</div><div>
<br /></div><div>So, to counter this, we must say YES to progress, YES to equality, YES to compassion, and YES to all Americans sharing the load.</div><div>
<br /></div><div>When we do that, we are saying YES to a life worth living for ourselves and the generations to come.</div><div>
<br /></div><div>Footnote* A friend posted this quote and I thought it appropriate to the news of the day;<i>"A tyrant must put on the appearance of uncommon devotion to religion. Subjects are less apprehensive of illegal treatment from a ruler whom they consider god-fearing and pious. On the other hand, they do less easily move against him, believing that he has the gods on his side." — Aristotle</i></div><div>
<br /></div><div>
<br /></div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-65365917933541241222011-08-22T10:04:00.007-02:002011-08-22T10:49:23.528-02:00Send 'Em In<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGkSG01vKNaLLmUNghB3roCcttjm1kUt7WD5eGm7_jCsi4VcoHtNuVKg1BxIbHGoFSZxTpKD2-kcUz0ilmzNdimfjIq26QaaGyCypprxU92pdwTYK80egOUnBvN6l6ZFLj8BIHWw/s1600/clowngop.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="display:block; margin:0px auto 10px; text-align:center;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 212px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgGkSG01vKNaLLmUNghB3roCcttjm1kUt7WD5eGm7_jCsi4VcoHtNuVKg1BxIbHGoFSZxTpKD2-kcUz0ilmzNdimfjIq26QaaGyCypprxU92pdwTYK80egOUnBvN6l6ZFLj8BIHWw/s320/clowngop.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5643650130500974914" /></a><b> The GOP candidates arrive for another debate! It's Tea Party Time!!</b><div style="text-align: center;"><b>
<br /></b></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">I never thought I would see the day that a group of candidates for the highest office in our nation would deliberately tell whoppers, misinform voters and generally show their racist bias in such an overt manner. I know that there have been lies told by politicians from day one in this nation and others. But to do it in such an in-your-face manner is criminal. The fact that there are those who buy into these lies is just plain sad.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">For years, the lies about adoption persisted. The fact that the truth is coming from those of us who experienced the mistreatment, grief and shame makes no difference to the spin doctors. We just get dismissed as bitter and angry.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">Now, we are being lied to about everything we know to be true and they just don't care. Faux news will make things up as they go. The GOP candidates try to rewrite history. They don't know as much as a 6th-grader knew about history and civics in my day. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">We are approaching an Idiocracy and, if you don't believe me, go visit the "Birthmom Buds" on Facebook, listen to a speech by Mispeak Bachmann or try to argue with an avid "birther" about the fact that the President WAS born in the US. Willful ignorance is going to take this nation down if we don't stand up, not just for the rights of individuals as put forth by the Constitution, but for TRUTH. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">I can see the drive for open records being detoured by the Corporate Congress and the state leggies who have had their palms greased. I can see no chance, at all, for the "sinful, sexual" Mothers to even ask for, much less receive the justice they deserve. How can we when we still have idiots who use the old "no one held a gun to your head" and "you're the one who spread your legs" arguments and think them valid?</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">We are no longer trudging up a long hill. We are climbing Everest with no equipment except the frail rope of truth. Like everything else in this corporate culture, truth has become a commodity and can be anything anyone wants it to be if they have the money and the connections. We have entered the Twilight Zone of American politics. Statesmen have been replaced by celebrities and proselytizers. There is NO government of, by and for the people. It has become the playground of the Kochs and the Murdocks and the DeVoes and their ilk. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">It is a truly bizarre circus and the clowns are truly scary. But we must have clowns, so send 'em in. Oh. Don't bother. THEY'RE HEEEEEER. </span></div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-75581584438692364282011-08-21T14:09:00.006-02:002011-08-21T15:26:36.043-02:00Of Forests and Trees<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmfpx936dBVMjxX5M8tiYkC_uhz75FNApim4_DnpgvBg3rvpltgUH4QevjFu60LnSS9Aw5MIB5eN4TrxmMRIp_x0knUx2F2RD24piW-wrhu-NDuWRVcgCOcm48PG1Fgnx4Dxdo4w/s1600/goindownhill.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 152px; height: 270px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgmfpx936dBVMjxX5M8tiYkC_uhz75FNApim4_DnpgvBg3rvpltgUH4QevjFu60LnSS9Aw5MIB5eN4TrxmMRIp_x0knUx2F2RD24piW-wrhu-NDuWRVcgCOcm48PG1Fgnx4Dxdo4w/s320/goindownhill.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5643349558988318162" /></a>
<br />I have come to ponder, recently, if I have kept my focus too narrow in recent years. While I was speaking out for justice for Mothers from the EMS and open records for adult adoptees, a lot was happening in the good, old US of A. For instance, we were slowly being bought up and sold out by corporate interests and their government toadies and we woke up, one day, to a massive recession and fears for our futures. Say what you will about bubbles and busts...someone screwed us over.<div>
<br /></div><div>Suddenly we had Rush Limbaugh, Glen Beck, Ann Coulter, Rick Santorum, and all the rest of them stirring the under-educated and over-churched to a frenzy. Where had I been? I had been dismissing these wannabe editorial pundits as insignificant and then I saw what they had managed to do. They played to the lowest common denominator and they played it well. I mean, how smart can the teabaggers be? They claim a Christian faith but revere Ayn Rand, a misogynistic, declared atheist whose only good point was her ability to write.
<br /><div>
<br /></div><div>I have pondered on this quite a deal. I have done some ranting as well, but the conclusion I have come to is this. If we allow certain groups, such as the Tea Party, the Far Right Republicans and <a href="http://www.dailykos.com/story/2011/08/20/1008835/-Another-ALEC-trick-at-Federal-Level-EXPOSED">ALEC</a> to control our government, buy out our supreme court, use racism, fundamentalist Christianity and hate to force their way into power, we can say hello again to maternity homes, forced surrenders and social engineering. All the progress made in the areas of women's rights and health will go down the drain, there will be thriving back-alley abortion operations and birth control will be tightly controlled by the powers that might be.</div><div>
<br /></div><div>Education is suffering and the Dumbing Down Of America is almost a <i>fait accompli. </i>What else can one think when MSNBC gives an hour or more to the wedding of some bimbo reality star? How else does one explain such TV hits as Parking Wars and Storage Wars? Why are science and nature programs no longer on mainstream networks? Why are PBS and NPR having constant beg-athons?</div><div>
<br /></div><div>As <a href="http://www.dailykos.com/story/2011/08/20/1008835/-Another-ALEC-trick-at-Federal-Level-EXPOSED">Wall Street</a> and CEOs play fast and loose with our livelihoods, America, the land of the free is going down the toilet and into history along with Rome, The Old British Empire and all the others that fell of their own weight and greed. I believe it will not be an alien invasion, global warming (REAL, by the way), an asteroid collision or a nuclear attack but a rotting from within that will bring us down. It may take another civil war to save us only this time the lines will be drawn in ideology, not northern and southern boundaries. </div><div>
<br /></div><div>We have presidential candidates that are totally ignorant about history and the meaning of the Constitution. They want to take it away and substitute the Bible and to Hell with the First Amendment. We who want justice and redress don't stand the chance of a snowball in July if these dogmatic dumb asses manage to win the nomination and election. Single motherhood will go back from being a choice to being a sin. A Corporate Theocracy isn't just science fiction material but a real and present threat.</div><div>
<br /></div><div>It took me taking a step back from all things surrender and adoption and looking at the big picture. And my tree was part of the forest. I am 66 and while not exactly ancient, I know that I am not going to be around for the big show that may or may not happen. All I can do is try to work to save the forest so that we can still breathe and then work on my tree. It will probably be those coming after me who will see the results, unless the corporate takeover is complete. We did not see our sons, fathers, daughters, sisters, brothers and friends die in foreign wars to allow this to happen.</div><div>
<br /></div><div>My son and I are discussing a trip to DC so that we can participate in the "Take Back The Dream" rally. I am signing petitions, writing letters to congress, the senate, our President and newspaper editors. I am supporting those who want to hold the line against a takeover of our government by the corporations and fundies. Living in a theocracy is no fun. Ask people in Iran, if you happen to be in a place where they can answer you honestly.</div><div>
<br /></div><div>I am feeling the earth move as the shades of Thomas Jefferson, Benjamin Franklin, George Washington, John Adams (the elder...not the little boy), Paul Revere and all the rest rail in anger at the blatant rewriting and skewing of history. Abraham Lincoln, Teddy Roosevelt (boy, do we need another 'trust-buster' like him), FDR and JFK are probably in tears, if there is an existence after death. Or maybe the railing and the crying are just me acting for them. This is certainly a piss-poor way to honor their memories by taking what they worked so diligently to create and making it unrecognizable and serving only the financially and theologically "elite."</div><div>
<br /></div><div>In any event, before we take the trip to redress, justice and reform, we need to make sure the vehicle is in running condition. I shall keep a close eye on my tree, but I need to get the nasties out of the forest. Anyone want to help?</div></div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-82204507188234124282011-08-18T08:18:00.010-02:002011-08-18T09:17:33.235-02:00Beating A Dead Horse Can Be Good<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzuKr4Bw9AOyEFE7rlcdTCjXs67LPyUyQGDMGGWY9D0qsAYT1jaxyObXidhVhtXqxXW0ozkbqmRNlhv0IOq9i-Bz_VGv0t7sL0GURgdnFigrkx2XIB2V7s5QIgjFXtOOn83OFkOw/s1600/fredandginger.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 243px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjzuKr4Bw9AOyEFE7rlcdTCjXs67LPyUyQGDMGGWY9D0qsAYT1jaxyObXidhVhtXqxXW0ozkbqmRNlhv0IOq9i-Bz_VGv0t7sL0GURgdnFigrkx2XIB2V7s5QIgjFXtOOn83OFkOw/s320/fredandginger.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5642139610293744946" /></a><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: rgb(255, 255, 255); "><i><span class="Apple-style-span" ><b>You say either and I say eye-ther
<br />You say neither and I say nie-ther
<br />Either, eye-ther, neither, nie-ther
<br />Let's call the whole thing off
<br />
<br />You say tomato, I say tomahto
<br />You eat potato and I eat potahto
<br />Tomato, tomahto, potato, potahto
<br />Let's call the whole thing off
<br />
<br />But oh, if we call the whole thing off then we must part
<br />And oh, if we ever part then that might break my heart
<br />
<br />So, if you wear pajamas and I wear pajahmas
<br />I'll wear pajamas and give up pajahmas
<br />For we know we need eachother so we
<br />Better call the calling off, off
<br />Oh, let's call the whole thing off
<br />
<br />You say ahfter and I say after
<br />You say lauhghter and I say laughter
<br />After, ahfter, laughter, lauhghter
<br />Let's call the whole thing off
<br />
<br />You say Havana and I say Havahna
<br />You eat banana and I eat banahna
<br />Havana, Havahna, banana, banahna
<br />Let's call the whole thing off
<br />
<br />But oh, if we call the whole thing off then we must part
<br />And oh, if we ever part then that might break my heart
<br />
<br />So, if you say oysters and I say ersters
<br />I'll eat oysters and give up ersters
<br />For we know we need each other so we
<br />Better call the calling off, off
<br />Oh, let's call the whole thing off
<br /></b></span></i></span><span class="Apple-style-span" style="background-color: rgb(192, 192, 192); "><i><b><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></b><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></i></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span" style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: 13px; background-color: rgb(192, 192, 192); ">
<br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">The battle of the "B" word has erupted again, on a Facebook group. It began, as far as I can tell, having entered the fray a bit late, by an adopted adult who was really angry at her mother and carried on by a mother or two who felt themselves to be the righteous voices of reason. It was impelled forward by hostility and a lack of understanding.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">Now, if it were just a matter of pronunciation, as in this cute ditty, above, that Fred warbled to Ginger, I think it would be relatively unimportant. But, in this case, it IS important. I can refer many people to the article by Diane Turski, "<a href="http://www.babyscoopera.com/articles/article_breeder.html">Why Birthmother Means Breeder</a>," or I could speak about the fight of African Americans to be referred to in a dignified manner, but there are always, it seems, those who want to push us back into our dusty niches.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">Yes, to all. LANGUAGE IS IMPORTANT. Can you hear me? This is an issue brought about by the civil and human rights of the mothers being decimated, especially during the BSE. We were defined, then, as being deviant, delinquent, careless young sluts. Most of us were just frightened girls who loved, maybe not wisely, but too well. We were judged and found lacking by the evidence of our humanity and passion. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">The author and serial adopter, Pearl Buck, first used the term "birth mother" in the 1950's. The early founders of Concerned United Birthparents left out the space in the middle of birth and mother and thought they had settled the issue. What happened, however, is that the industry and society took off with the term and the meaning became one that is anything but dignified and respect-worthy. It is used against us to reduce us as mothers and women. It is used to pre-define a surrendering mother before she even thinks about surrender. It is a tool and a ploy of the industry and social engineers. It is a way for those who adopt to deny our motherhood as many would like to deny our very existence.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">It's funny that they also apply the word to unwed fathers. A man can't be a "birth" father because he didn't give birth. Ergo, as one mother pointed out, wouldn't that make the males in the equation "Ejaculationfathers?" It is, and always will be, a term of denigration. There is no way you can take the term, as the adoptees were able to do with "Bastard," and make it one of "in-your-face self-respect." Perhaps, if we were to call ourselves "Sluts," that would have more of a ring? No, not really. A bastard is not responsible for the circumstances of their birth. We were forced and coerced and we need a sobriquet that recognizes that fact and the fact that we require respect. "Slut" just plays into the stereotype.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">If Gandhi, Martin Luther King and many others realized the importance of how language is used, why is it such a battle for Natural Mothers to insist on being referred to in a dignified and respectful way? We are only trying to claim that which was ours before we were stripped of all autonomy and thrust into a cycle of grief and shame. Shame is not acceptable any more. Self-respect is essential to anyone making a mark in the battle for inquiry and redress and reform.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">So save your, "it doesn't matter" speeches for to-may-to/to-mah-to. I am not a walking uterus, a breeder for the infertile or a non-mother. I am a Mother, or, if you insist on differentiation, a Natural Mother. </span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">You can call me a birthmother all you like. But I will not answer you.</span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></div><div><span class="Apple-style-span">
<br /></span></div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-87935858822888181722011-07-18T10:25:00.007-02:002011-07-18T12:55:08.746-02:00And The Beat Goes On..<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgM9rI3xIkViufJxKXDac5la4AbGQPA-EFXon4XqDubF3tto9mP10wJO0IkKOEZKMe-ivD_mimNZHnpHpnC54oFS8sRUiYdrFX8KqJG7qEO-UIK3mrSlUXhBnpDSSOws3-vnh5cgw/s1600/Ahahahahaha.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 227px; height: 225px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgM9rI3xIkViufJxKXDac5la4AbGQPA-EFXon4XqDubF3tto9mP10wJO0IkKOEZKMe-ivD_mimNZHnpHpnC54oFS8sRUiYdrFX8KqJG7qEO-UIK3mrSlUXhBnpDSSOws3-vnh5cgw/s320/Ahahahahaha.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5630674695353514146" /></a>Look above this post at the blog header. It says, in PLAIN ENGLISH, <b><i>"My home. My blog. My opinions. This is NOT a forum for debate</i></b>." What's not to understand? I just had to hit on this once again as I seem to get more and more attention each time I do. *whistles and giggles* <div><br /></div><div>My message and opinions are not exactly PC as far as adoption is concerned, but they are the true and valid experiences and opinions of legions of mothers and adoptees who have had to deal with the painfully unnatural nature of the separation and the expectations put upon our children. </div><div><br /></div><div>This is the nice thing about the right to Freedom of Speech. As long as I don't post porn, violent sedition or libel, I can say whatever I like<b> as the owner of this website </b>(as defined by Google). I could have made Motherhood Deleted a subscription-only site, but I am not doing any good preaching to the choir. We want to reach the general public and people with open minds. This blog is to educate, not debate. Debate, as far as I, personally, am concerned, wastes my precious time and space. Usually, it turns into attacks and the sort of people who want to debate are not going to have their minds changed by any argument I might give.<b> It is my right to monitor comments and delete any that I find argumentative and non-productive or (as in the case of one or two) deceptively "curious."</b></div><div><br /></div><div>But, lest any of you frustrated flamers think you are not being heard, fear not! For, on my Face Book page, I copy and paste, for all my friends to see, your words of censure and your banal insults. We have many a laugh over them. The personal attacks are the best, especially for those who really know me. I still have to chuckle about the one that accused me of driving a Buick with a Palin for Prez bumper sticker on it, especially since I drive a PT cruiser and am a die-hard, left-leaning Democrat. That one will make me laugh for a long time. Her snap judgement of a complete stranger is totally comical.</div><div><br /></div><div>Then there is the confused person who says that, since I allow the contents of my blog to be read by the general public, I should provide a forum for those who....well, "disagree" would be the polite term. That a public website is not the same as my home. Well, uh...read above.</div><div><br /></div><div>So I am going to say it again, LOUDER. THIS IS MY BLOG. HERE, IT IS SAFE FOR ME TO POST MY OPINIONS AND OBSERVATIONS IN THE SPIRIT OF FREE SPEECH. IF YOU DON'T AGREE WITH ME, GET YOUR OWN BLOG AND POST YOUR OPINIONS AND OBSERVATIONS. But do watch out for that "libel" thing.</div><div><br /></div><div>You know, a lot of flamers have a habit of citing the rare "hard case" when justifying adoption. The fact is that children with AIDS were not an issue during the BSE and the crack whore mother was also a very rare bird. She and the afflicted, orphaned children still are not the norm. I have to thank my friend, <a href="http://bastardette.blogspot.com/">Bastardette</a> for pointing this fact out to me. </div><div><br /></div><div>And, there are numerous kin who DO want to take on the children of family members who can't care for them, but the state and others think that it is more profitable to subsidize an adoption that to help out with expenses for real family. This is the kind of social engineering that wants to deny the poor the right to have families and raise children. I'm still a fan of the idea of beefing up the legal guardian descriptions so that the lie of "as if born to" becomes unnecessary and children receive love and nurture without the pressure of trying to be what they are not.</div><div><br /></div><div>But to hear it from the ones salivating over the prospect of getting a baby, toddler or being a saint and "saving" an older child, the mothers are worthless and the families of the mother and father are uncaring 100% of the time. NOT TRUE. Cases such as that are still in the minority, PAPs still lust after that healthy, preferably female infant, and there is money to be made and hearts to break.</div><div><br /></div><div>There are also lives to forever mark with the stain and strain of the attempt to break the natural bond. No, it doesn't break, but it bends and twists out of shape over the years and grief and confusion are among the least of the worries of the Mother and Adopted Adult. Those who have not walked in our shoes and who operate from the vantage point of the one who benefits from that separation should not judge when we speak out...they will but they shouldn't.</div><div><br /></div><div>So flamers, keep them coming. We get a really good laugh after we tear your arguments to shreds. The personal attacks are really special. I don't go to the happy-sappy, pro-adoption blogs and attack or argue. Those people are saying what they have the right to say, whether I agree or not. And I sure don't judge the character of people I don't know, personally.</div><div><br /></div><div>I am very lucky when it comes to family and friends. I guess that is why I am able to keep on posting even when being attacked by strangers and nutbars. I feel the love and support and it keeps me keeping on. </div><div><br /></div><div>And about the one who accused me of having a "heart of coal," my husband has an owl carved from coal that we bought in our future retirement home, West Virginia. Does that count? And you know what happens to coal under a lot of pressure?</div><div><br /></div><div>It turns into diamonds.<br /><div><span class="Apple-style-span" ><span class="Apple-style-span" style="line-height: 24px;"><br /></span></span></div></div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-51955114333425111722011-07-17T11:40:00.004-02:002011-07-17T12:19:56.641-02:00Bless Their Hearts<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgC54UWXx1rctSkJwShqJbxeV1aCw7SzTwQVVtw-ESnZcyP9ohyCOqvK8uSDCrHH0KZgLHrPY2U_8TWxuVSprKOoWXHPydKAntYcYNah4tVzYb07FqsiGPHmclH6UfNixzk9P69rg/s1600/Steel_Magnolias_33462_Medium.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 320px; height: 206px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgC54UWXx1rctSkJwShqJbxeV1aCw7SzTwQVVtw-ESnZcyP9ohyCOqvK8uSDCrHH0KZgLHrPY2U_8TWxuVSprKOoWXHPydKAntYcYNah4tVzYb07FqsiGPHmclH6UfNixzk9P69rg/s320/Steel_Magnolias_33462_Medium.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5630317119250224082" /></a>If you have ever lived in any part of the South for any amount of time, then you know that the women of the South have a way of softening the harshest criticisms by adding one little phrase:"Bless his/her heart." It's all part of that manners thing. Yes, I said that southerners are polite. I didn't say they weren't human. Gossip is as prevalent in the South as anywhere else.<div><br /></div><div>I remember being at church one Easter morning when I was about twelve and overhearing what I refer to as the "Biddy Brigade" critiquing the clothes and hats that other women were wearing. One spoke up and said, "You know, I think Malvena is color-blind, bless her heart." Malvena (not her real name but close) was resplendent in day-glow, hot pink. Her cheeks were pink, her lipstick was pink...even her shoes, bag, corsage and eyeshadow were pink. I sang in the choir and all eyes in the loft were constantly drawn to that eye-blinding spot of pink in the congregation. I know she thought the looks she received were admiring and I had to give her an A for having Chutzpah (chooots-pah?) enough to wear what she liked.</div><div><br /></div><div>These days, people are prone to just put out those zingers without adding the softener at the end. But I have a lot of hearts I want to bless. For instance:</div><div><br /></div><div>The adoption industry seems to smugly believe that we Mothers are no threat to them, Bless their Hearts. </div><div><br /></div><div>That PAP bashed me online because she is still insecure about adopting, Bless her Heart.</div><div><br /></div><div>My child's adopter went into a nasty tailspin when my child found me, Bless her Heart.</div><div><br /></div><div>Those folks seem to think they are more entitled to our children than we are, Bless their Hearts.</div><div><br /></div><div>Everyone connected with adoption seems to think that we mothers should take a back seat and suffer. How silly, Bless their Hearts.</div><div><br /></div><div>Gee! We are still treated like teenage delinquents and our adult children are still treated like infants. These people are seriously deluded, Bless their Hearts.</div><div><br /></div><div>Michelle Bachmann is bat guano crazy, Bless her Heart. (Sorry...had to throw that one in)</div><div><br /></div><div>So, you see that any allusion to or critique of delusional, greedy, arrogant and rapacious behavior, such as that which abounds in the world of surrender coercion, the Industry of Adoption, and the rabid market for babies can get the Steel Magnolia treatment by just adding a "Bless his/her/their Heart(s)" with a sympathetic smile, to the end. </div><div><br /></div><div>Then you look at your friend, grin really big, and wink. </div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-18075173474961962682011-07-16T19:01:00.003-02:002011-07-16T19:28:08.221-02:00Welcome To My Home<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgM7vFdsZDdbYO_-rBdA4l4OgZ7e5EUejwAeVsdov2-Ef_3FfnUM3uqe9-MuFlYitC-Og0DeveqLi1LAaUGAudAaZTUNf5dgwVokv8nYenq41CAEexYGpwm-3RHzCR4FEDYDn9veQ/s1600/civility.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 300px; height: 231px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgM7vFdsZDdbYO_-rBdA4l4OgZ7e5EUejwAeVsdov2-Ef_3FfnUM3uqe9-MuFlYitC-Og0DeveqLi1LAaUGAudAaZTUNf5dgwVokv8nYenq41CAEexYGpwm-3RHzCR4FEDYDn9veQ/s320/civility.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5630059949824005170" /></a><br />And that's what this is, you know. My blog, my Face Book page are my territories. When someone posts comments on either it is the same as someone coming into my house and talking. No one with any real breeding and sense of decency would ever go into anyone's home, especially the home of someone they don't know, and forcefully and even viciously challenge the home owner's beliefs, values and standards and opinions.<div><br /></div><div>Now I was raised in the south for most of my growing up years, and lived in SC until 1996. Well bred, intelligent southerners put a lot of stock in good manners. It was a shock for me to learn that others didn't see civility and respect as we did...something important. And on the Internet?? The anonymity of the 'net seems to let people think they can say whatever they want to whomever they please, stir up any kind of trouble they can and get away with it.</div><div><br /></div><div>This is why I have monitored comments. I have no desire to see MY blog, expressing MY opinions and MY beliefs being turned into a forum for flame wars. I have no need, here in my home, to be "fair and balanced" nor am I open to those who wish to change my attitude about adoption with near evangelical zeal. If I won't let Mormons or Jehovah's Witnesses into my home, why should I let your argumentative, pro-adoption posts be published on my blog?</div><div><br /></div><div>There are some who have the opinion that it is good to have debate and they do allow it, to an extent, on their blogs. Good for them. To each their own. But this is my soap box. This is not subjective journalism, here, but objective editorializing.<br /><div><br /></div><div>Recently, I have been sandbagged by a number of posters, most of them anonymous, who pop up every now and then and try to get my goat. Well, Nanny's in the back yard, cropping grass, waiting to be milked and you can't have her. </div><div><br /></div><div>The insults that follow comments being deleted are hysterically funny in many cases. You can tell that these pro-A's taking umbrage at my opinions don't know me at all. One accused me of having a Sarah Palin bumper sticker. I laughed so hard I started coughing. Anonymous, Honey, I am so left-winged and so anti-Tea Party and Faux News and the GOP that my husband, a moderate, never discusses politics with me. I read that to him and we chortled most of the afternoon.</div><div><br /></div><div>So, to make it clear,<b> Motherhood Deleted is my house</b> and I don't allow my beliefs and values and standards to be challenged in my house. You want to air another side of the issue? Write your own blog and leave mine alone. I don't frequent the blogs of pro-adoptionists and so you won't have to worry about me doing the hit and run, anonymous thing. </div><div><br /></div><div>If you want a fight, go to Craigslist and their adoption section. Someone is always raking someone else over the coals over there. </div><div><br /></div><div>Oh, and don't think we aren't being taken seriously, us Mothers from the BSE. We are.</div><div><br /></div></div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com9tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-33752164.post-60145836469553739702011-07-13T18:42:00.004-02:002011-07-13T19:19:25.002-02:00And There's Another One!!<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9UwAbbgrncuK4kir18JyyuFsA34jOrBEEJf2zKS6st6sJsYB_7kmbGIK6ke1lIQK182ovJek7sw_zYzHF0rsTTlHsLO_twd9QxDhWqjMhu9ao_BDanogWX41NR-sNAe4TlfVhtA/s1600/mother_holding_new_born_baby_81a-00000502-001.jpg" onblur="try {parent.deselectBloggerImageGracefully();} catch(e) {}"><img style="float:left; margin:0 10px 10px 0;cursor:pointer; cursor:hand;width: 207px; height: 320px;" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg9UwAbbgrncuK4kir18JyyuFsA34jOrBEEJf2zKS6st6sJsYB_7kmbGIK6ke1lIQK182ovJek7sw_zYzHF0rsTTlHsLO_twd9QxDhWqjMhu9ao_BDanogWX41NR-sNAe4TlfVhtA/s320/mother_holding_new_born_baby_81a-00000502-001.jpg" border="0" alt="" id="BLOGGER_PHOTO_ID_5628948473481617090" /></a><br />Just when I find myself in the delighted position of not having to decline comments for a long time, along comes another PAP (or so she says) with her, "just curious" questions about my views on adoption. Here's her seemingly innocuous comment:<div><br /></div><div><i>"Hi there-<br />I just stumbled across your blog, and I must say that I am intrigued. I am a soon-to-be adoptive parent and while I don’t expect rainbows and puppy dogs, I am excited. I was wondering if you think that adoption is ever a good thing? <b>In a perfect world, I don’t believe adoption would ever be necessary. But since we live in an imperfect world,</b> do you believe that there are any situations where adoption can be the best option (given the circumstances) for all parties involved? Interested to hear your thoughts." </i><br /></div><div><i><br /></i></div><div>Whatever would adopters, the industry and PAPs do without that good, old, imperfect world (crack-whore moms and undeserving, single teens) to justify them doing what they really feel, inside, they have a perfect right to do? Sorry, but I don't buy it, especially if said PAP is lusting after a womb-fresh infant or toddler. There they are, just like saints, waiting to take in the, seemingly, "unwanted." How convenient.</div><div><br /></div><div>To the commenter: You don't really want to hear my thoughts. You want to try to argue me down or see what king of opposition there is out here in the real world. Often, agencies, church-affiliated, especially, will assume an identity and try to stir the pot among those of us who don't like adoption, especially as it was practiced in the last century. Unfortunately, we are learning from heart-broken moms, that coercion has just put on some pretty lace, powdered its face, spritzed on some Rainbow Farte parfum and still going at it. The ads are slick and the tactics are slicker.</div><div><br /></div><div>Yes, I do think that there are some women who truly don't want their babies and I encourage them to seek out a first-trimester termination. Better yet, avail yourself of available and effective birth control and seek termination if that fails. Why reduce yourself to serving as a brood mare for someone who sees themselves as more deserving and subject a child to emotional pain? If you feel you must carry to term, then see about finding a way for that child to remain in his/her family of origin. There has to be a daddy somewhere, no?</div><div><br /></div><div>I talk to a lot of adopted people every day. One thing I have learned is that the hardest thing for anyone to accept is the thought that their mother did not want them, that said mother saw them as disposable. That idea does a good service for the adopters and the facilitators, even if it often slanders innocent Mothers who were coerced. From what I have seen, Mr. and Mrs. PAP, the most loving, most nurturing adopters in the worlds cannot take the sting out of that abandonment issue. All the love in the world cannot heal that wound and "attachment therapy" is a ridiculous concept.</div><div><br /></div><div>And as for reunion, there is no reunion that can make up for the years lost, the bond twisted and the misconceptions that grew and grew. It is a minefield born of the most unnatural separation there is. Even after 18 years, I find myself still walking on eggshells occasionally and suffering through periodic breaches in the relationships. I was not put on this earth to provide an infant for C. and C. S. or for K. and S. S. !! There is no "meant to be" or "God's Will" about it...just injustice, a sick, punitive society and the greed that marks us as nothing more than a garden plot from which a product can be reaped. </div><div><br /></div><div>My children were conceived and gestated in MY body. It was MY job to raise them and care for them. I suffered and they suffered because I was not allowed to do my job. Don't expect any friendly words about adoption from me. </div><div><br /></div><div>There. Those are my thoughts. Accept or reject them, but don't expect to change my mind or my message. </div><div><br /></div><div>Adoption separation sucks.</div><div><br /></div><div><br /></div>Robinhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/07580241881953821182noreply@blogger.com19