By the vain, vacuous and the venal....OK, I'm through with the "v" words.
But, boy have the mother-haters, the self-justifiers and the adoption worshipers come out of the woodwork after the Evan B. Donaldson Institute report on the Welfare of NATURAL Mothers. To see what I mean, just go here, if you can stomach it.
The nastiness has even gone international with (one in particular) would-be, self-appointed, secretly mom-hating pundits voicing whatever idiocy they can to attract attention. There are the self-entitled, compassionless adopters filling the posts with denial and charges of unfit mothers. Then there are a few courageous others, including my favorite Mom from Down Under, trying to get the former to listen to the truth with their hearts and minds rather than with their emotional wants, damaged psyches and grandiose egos. Pro-family preservation blogs and message boards are being attacked, infiltrated and all is being done that these terrified tyrants can think of to discredit their own people, the Evans B. Donaldson institute of "I Know What This Society Needs" fame...ya gotta love it!
For many pro-adoptionists, it is very threatening that the mother who has been or stands in danger of being separated from her child by adoption is finally getting a voice, although the voice is still not speaking, totally, for her. The report does fall short and contains a few glaring errors and erroneous conclusions that are nothing but concessions to the industry. However, this has given us the opening we need. We are being heard, someone is feeling the pressure, someone is running a bit scared and so they are throwing us a bone just like they did with the idea of so-called "open" adoptions. The problem is, that this time, the bone was something the pro-adoption community was saving for soup! Arrgh!
What these distinguished folks responsible for the EBDI report have actually done is given us a wonderful opportunity to get the COMPLETE message across. There are millions of women and their surrendered children who are owed redress...at least a major, public, detailed apology from the industry. There is a real need to scrap the current, profit-driven industry and dismantle the state agencies, altogether. It feeds on the most vulnerable, caters to the most self-entitled and has perverted the entire painful process with spins and media tricks and political rhetoric that have managed to make a pure and painful tragedy seem like a heart-warming, tear-jerking, Disney movie, and, whether they admit it or not, it is all in the name of the "bottom line" or $$$$$.
The dark and slimy underbelly of adoption is showing and there are those who have benefited or stand to benefit from adoption that don't like that at all. The angry adoptees, adults who hang on to their blaming, shaming anger at and hatred of their mothers like Linus hangs on to his blanket are also out in force. They don't want their emotional Binky taken away. I am waiting for the first of these "intellectual giants" to start hurling the "breeders" and "birth-bitches" names, because, like, that is waaay mature, you know?
Go ahead and have at it, Oh Minions of the Machine. Bash away with your specious, unfounded charges of welfare moms and baby dumpers and crackwhores. When you run out of steam and start repeating yourself (actually, you already do that), we will still be here, we will still be talking and posting and wearing our ribbons and writing our letters to editors and congresspeople and educating our friends and acquaintances and helping the frozen moms and the under-informed moms to awaken. We have the truth of what has happened to us and that is all the weapon we need in this war...you can deny all you want, but you cannot, legitimately DISPROVE anything we say because it is real.
And to the baby-hungry that see that healthy, white infant slipping through their fingers, maybe it's time you learned that the desire for a baby doesn't translate into deserving a baby. No one owes you their flesh and blood just because you can't have one of your own or because you want a certain gender to compliment the child you already have or because you are deluded into thinking you can attain sainthood by adopting someone else's womb-fresh baby. We're going to continue to concentrate on keeping mother and baby together. After all, that's how it should have always been done.