Everybody look what's going down.....
Sometimes, the best plans are not those that are touted while still in the embryonic stage, but that are carefully incubated and nurtured until they are ready to fly on their own merits. We are watching and formulating and refining our plans. We are standing up and speaking out.
Our adult children are turning out to be a very scrappy lot, as well. Their fight for their OBCs is admirable. I would love to know that those who believe the industry hype that it is us, their mothers, who block their worthy ambition, would read, listen and believe that we are capable of making our own decisions and forming our own relationships. We represent the majority and we want our children to know us.
We had our autonomy taken from us when we were vulnerable, alone, pregnant and without familial support. Now, in our 5th, 6th, and 7th decades of life, we are taking that autonomy back and speaking out. Though the message may differ a bit from mother to mother, the underlying truth that we all want to convey is this....we are mad as Hell and we are not going to take it, anymore. We are tired to our bones of pro-adoption entities, attorneys, agencies and social workers presuming to speak for us. Using "beemommie" privacy as a ruse to deny open records is one such presumptive action. Please, Mr. Legal Eagle...show me, in the body of the surrender documents that I was forced to sign as a minor, where it says that I am guaranteed any kind of privacy or protection from my own child. That's something I neither requested nor was I promised. But the myth rolls on.
Just as our children have a battle on their hands, so do we. We are the source. We are the first victims of the idiocy of transference of a healthy infant from our bodies to strangers. We are adults, now...no longer frightened, vulnerable young girls who can be controlled by shame and intimidation and horror stories.
So, to paraphrase the song...There's a woman with the truth over there, telling the industry, "you'd better beware."
Special thanks to a very talented Senior Mom for the graphic.
8 comments:
Outspoken birth mothers might be the keys that unlock the vaults to our birth records.
The lies the "industry" has brainwashed our society to believe need to be exposed and birth mothers can do that for us (adoptees).
Thank you for writing this. We just want what non-adoptees have: our birth records. We want equal access and equal rights. We are legitimate Americans.
Please note, Anon, that we are not just speaking out for open records for adoptees. We are speaking out for justice for mothers of the BSE/EMS....your mothers...and equal access to records for us, not just for our children. We are defying the so-called "experts" that think they have a right to speak for us when we are perfectly capable of speaking for ourselves. Now, if adoptees could support us in our endeavors towards justice, that could help us, as well.
One term those of us who are outspoken about the crimes of the adoption industry tend to no longer use or endorse is "birth"mother. Our motherhood extends beyond just the act of giving birth and we are more than a walking incubator. I enjoy adopted people posting to this blog and I am glad to see your input. But, could you use "natural"mother, instead? It would be very appreciated.
Hey Anon, and yes, I rejected that last tirade of yours...You forget WE WERE THERE. Before we were coerced into signing those horrible papers, many of us named our children, and begged our parents for just a little bit of support so that they could grow up in their own families. ANY medical records or original birth certificate that was in effect prior to surrender are as much ours as yours. Get over yourself and stop blaming scared teen girls for doing something they were forced into doing.
I asked nicely. You replied sarcastically. That's not the way to garner support. Luckily, there are some adopted adults who are a lot more understanding than you are.
Read "The Girls Who Went Away" and try to learn something.
One of the most infuriating things about all this is that deformers buy into it--that is, use the enemy's langauge and concepts. The current mess in Cali and Tx comes from our friends." Who is the real enemy?
Love the graphic!
Bless you Dear Robin.
Thank you for your "TRUE GRIT"
Your FORTHRIGHTNESS, in BRINGING INTO THE FORE, what is OUR TRUE HISTORY.
I long for the day when our lost children "WAKE UP,STAND BESIDE US,AND FIGHT FOR JUSTICE,OF THE INJUSTICE WE SUFFER FROM IN THIS "EVIL EXCHANGE" adoption.
This bottomless abyss of sorow, that has seared every part of our being.
Oh that we mothers of such profound loss, HAD WORLD RECOGNITION,and APOLOGIES,FOR THE HOLOCAUST WE LIVE WITH DAY IN AND DAY OUT.
Tartan Hugs.
Marah66.
Great post as always, Robin. I love the graphic, too! Did you make that? You use great graphics in all your posts.
Kathymom
Hi Kathy. Thanks but I didn't do the graphic. I used it with the generous approval of Leslie B., who created it.
Kudos to Leslie for a most excellent graphic and most truthful words. Thanks Leslie, Thanks Robin!!
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