Monday, August 02, 2010

Mending Broken Spirits


On the day when
the weight deadens
on your shoulders
and you stumble,
may the clay dance
to balance you.

And when your eyes
freeze behind
the grey window

and the ghost of loss  
gets in to you,                                                                                  
may a flock of colours,
indigo, red, green,
and azure blue
come to awaken in you
a meadow of delight.

When the canvas frays
in the currach of thought
and a stain of ocean
blackens beneath you,
may there come across the waters
a path of yellow moonlight
to bring you safely home.

May the nourishment of the earth be yours,
may the clarity of light be yours,
may the fluency of the ocean be yours,
may the protection of the ancestors be yours.
And so may a slow
wind work these words
of love around you,
an invisible cloak
to mind your life.

~ John O'Donohue ~
Today another broken spirit started on the journey to healing. A friend, a woman that I have known since we were both 14, finally gathered the strength to reach out through the dark veil of secrecy and lies and find her daughter, taken for adoption on New Year's Eve, 1963. My ex-husband, then just a friend of hers and unknown to me, drove her and her mother to the Flo Crit where she stayed until her daughter was born.

She contacted me through her raised daughter's Facebook page. She has been through a few rough years and her health is failing. She has a pacemaker and other ailments and she was feeling that primal urge to make sure her daughter was well and to let her know of health issues that had arisen since the surrender.
It didn't take me long to find out her daughter's adoptive name and where she lived. She had registered in several places. There were a few complications that called for the input from a third party, but a search that began on Friday morning has culminated in a 3-hour phone conversation between my friend and her daughter, this morning. They will be meeting, face to face, on Sunday. Rather than a happy ending, this is just the beginning.
I've tried to tell my friend that it isn't called the "reunion roller-coaster" for nothing. She is, as I was, still in the grips of the good beemommy mode but is emerging from the fog. I was pleased to witness her anger at the lies both she and her daughter were told. To me, that is a  healthy and appropriate response to this farce that we remember in our nightmares as the EMS/BSE.
The pacemaker my friend wears keeps her heart beating at the correct rate. Hopefully, learning about her adult child's life, meeting her grand-children and great-grandchildren and realizing how helpless she was to fight the monster that separated them will lead her on the road to healing the dark hole of loss in her heart.
Beannacht, Sylvia and may all the peace of truth be yours and your daughter's.


Carlynne said...

wishing them much love and healing on this journey!

Anonymous said...

God Speed, Sylvia.

Sandy Young said...

Simply lovely.....

Robin said...

LOL..not bad work for a person who has not devoted years to searching, huh, Sandy? LOL

Anonymous said...

Very beautiful Robin. Hope mother and daughter find joy and happiness in their new reunion. Can't wait to hear updates.


Sandy Young said...

Nope, Robin, not bad at all! LOL! Odd that you can do searches, be an advocate for mothers, blog and still run a home, husband,dog and children! Some can't...or won't!

maryanne said...

Best wishes to Sylvia in reunion. Thanks for the Irish blessing. O'Donohue has written some lovely books about Celtic spirituality. Here is another anonymous old Irish blessing:

Old Irish Blessing

(In translation from the Gaelic,
author unknown)

May the blessing of light be on you
Light within and light without
May the blessed sunlight shine on you
And warm your heart
Till it glows like a great peat fire
So that the stranger can come in
And warm himself
And also a friend

May the light shine out
Of the two eyes of you
Like two candles set
In the windows of a house
Bidding the wanderer to come in
Out of the cold

May the blessing of rain be on you
The soft, sweet rain
May it fall so gently on you
That all the little flowers may spring up
And spread their fragrance
On the air

May the blessing of the great rain be on you
May it beat upon your spirit
And wash it fair and clean
And leave there only a shiny pool
Where the bloom of heaven lies reflected
And sometimes a star

May you ever have a kindly greeting
For them you pass
As you go along the road
May the blessing of the earth be on you
The great, round earth

May it rest easy under you
When you lay out upon it
At the end of a busy day

May it rest easy over you
At the end
When you lay out under it
May it rest so easy over you
That your spirit may be up from under it

Quickly, up and off
And on its way to God.

Robin said...

Thanks, Maryanne. I love the poetry and prose of the land of my ancestors. I have a couple of books, one mostly O'Donahue and one that is more general and that one is in it. My friend is a bit nervous, but excited as well. Keep some warm thoughts going for her and her daughter come Sunday.

Linda said...

Thanks, Robin! Ive been following Syl's story on your FB page. Every time I see another Mother and her child bring the lies of adoption to light, it reminds me of why we need to keep exposing the evils of adoption.