Saturday, April 10, 2010
Conversations From An Afternoon Dog Walk
One of my neighbors, a lady just a few years younger than me, mentioned the story of Artem Saveliev (see previous blog post) and I told them what I knew of the story. The conversation turned to adoption, in general and I jumped it with both feet.
These people are all relatively untouched by adoption. The closest they have come is knowing someone who adopted. I started off with my story (a couple of them had heard it before) and the hopes we have for eventual justice for the mothers of the EMS and even got in a plug for open access to original birth certificates, I was amazed at how little these folks really knew about all of it.
Their understanding of the subject was just the simplified, sanitized and air-brushed version the industry and government supporters have fed the public over the years. Either a young woman is "too young" or her hubby is a beast or she is a druggie or the child is an orphan, etc., etc. So then the facilitators in the white hats ride in on their steeds and whisk the children away to picture-perfect, forever families. Cue rising violin music, sunset and.....cut. Pass the hankies and they live happily ever after.
I think I corrected quite a few mistaken impressions in a 45-minute walk. And they asked some very intelligent questions which leads me to believe the industry and their spin doctors might be underestimating John Q. Public. I noted that all of us owned dogs that were shelter rescues and opined that this was the kind of adoption that got my seal of approval.
One man, whose wife is, as she puts it, "11 months pregnant and holding" (She is due to be induced on Monday) was very thoughtful as we headed back for our street. It seems that before they became expectant parents, they were considering adoption. He mentioned, as we parted ways, that if this little boy they are greeting on Monday is the only child they ever have, they will feel blessed and not feel compelled to buy him a sister or brother. "It just wouldn't be fair to anyone involved, would it?" he asked.
No James, it wouldn't be fair. Enjoy your son.