Tuesday, April 06, 2010
Just A Reminder
This blog is like my personal den. I and those who think in the same (controversial) manner that I do are safe here. It is not a forum for "lively debate," flaming, censure, challenges or nit-picking arguments. If you want to take my comments to another venue and tear them apart, I can't stop you. But this is like my home and I will allow nothing here that I wouldn't allow in my home. I appreciate the fact that there are those who follow me who do not see some things the same way I do and I hope they use this blog to learn what the "other faction" is thinking. If I want to argue some of these points, I can always go to Yahoo Answers or Craigslist and have at it. Sit back, Have a cup of whatever and read.
Now that that is taken care of for another few weeks, I have some things to say that some might not like at all. First, while the timeline, beginning and end, of the EMS/BSE are debated, it doesn't change the fact that it is a historical happening, and that women began to have more choices and less pressure to surrender around the mid-'70's. I choose that time frame because it was in 1975 that I was first invited to a baby shower for a single mom, 18. I ached with envy inside and even wanted to boycott the shower, but I didn't and I am glad I went.
I noted that she was still attending classes at USCS, and mentioned to her mom that I was surprised the university allowed pregnant, single students. Her mom told me that she was equally surprised and even more so when she found out they there was day care available for both married and single moms at the school. I also took that opportunity to commend that mother for supporting her daughter.
So you see, Roe v. Wade aside, we who lived the EMS also lived through and witnessed its demise. That is first-hand knowledge of events and it's hard to ignore facts. We started seeing women being allowed to work who were single and pregnant rather than being fired as soon as they started to show. We witnessed the fair housing act which meant that very few landlords had the luxury of being moral arbiters who would render a single woman homeless should she become pregnant. We observed the fading of the stigma surrounding unmarried motherhood and watched (with considerable inner pain) as families supported their daughters and welcomed the newest member with joy.
I accept that there were still families and enclaves in the US who continued to hold the bad, old attitudes and that coercion is still alive even though it has changed to meet the challenges of a different society. But please give us a break. We know what happened to us. We were there. If it is hard to wrap your minds around the kind of world we lived in, then take our word for it. If we say that women began to have more choices after a certain date, then it's true....not an insult, but a fact.
And we are in the last decades of our lives. Many of us have already gone on to whatever lies beyond life. This is our last chance to get back a little of what was ours. Don't begrudge us the effort. If you can't support us, then leave us be. It took us decades to wake from the sleep of the coerced and shamed. We don't have that long to see that the injustice is addressed.
Thanks for reading.